Believing caregivers, how do I reconcile that scripture says to put others before me whereas the secular world says put me first?

Smeshque, of course.

I want to remind you that righteous anger is biblical and it is okay to feel it. It is a normal, natural emotion to the situation with your mom and siblings.

May God give you the strength to forgive them, they know not what they do.

Hugs!

And of course I will pray for you.

Smeshque, I totally understand what you are going through believe me.

Towards the end of my mom's life she and I spent a few of her birthdays just the two of us. I knew all my siblings knew when her Birthday was. I think everyone just was waiting for the next one to plan something and since I didn't feel like rounding them up (and why should have I or you for that matter) They know when your mom's b'day is.

So there we were, the two of us. Mom looking sad cause the others didn't even phone. The thing that really hurt was the fact that my younger brother (who is a real dick) would light up her face when he walked into a room. And he never lifted a finger. One day we were both visiting mom at the nursing home. I was in the washroom and heard my mom saying to him "you are the best thing that ever happened to me" To say I was hurt was an understatement. When I had done everything and he had done nothing.

I still think of these things four years after my mom's death. I know it's pointless and I pray long and hard about these things Smeshque. So don't beat yourself up too much. You are only human.

Please pray for me, I am having some difficulty with feelings towards my siblings who do not care.

I am trying to make a special 80th for Mom. It is hard doing all this alone knowing there are others out there who should care.

I am just really struggling with the weight of the feelings I do not want to have about my siblings. So please pray for me. Please.

I feel so guilty for having these feelings and I am praying about it.

Thank you, I needed that reminder.

God is always right on time. Never ceases to amaze me.

Imagine if we all humbled ourselves and called on Jesus, looking to Heaven expecting when we prayed. That would be the rapturing faith to get us home.

Smeshque: So, so very true. If we don't plant the seeds of God's words to share with others, we don't give ourselves the opportunity to share HIS message of salvation, if only they desire to accept it. We do good work in doing sowing. That's a beautiful new Avatar, in the form of the signage you saw. Just lovely and very true. Every town needs that sign.

Your labor is never in vain, but comes back to you on hundred fold. Wait on the Lord ...

Knowing that this labor of love is a difficult and challenging one, I have been studying some things and last night I put these two scriptures together.
So I am just sharing that maybe it will be encouragement, or reviving or helpful to you all. As I was encouraged by it.
One of the things I found interesting was that these two verses share the same numbers only reversed. Anyway interesting to me.

But this I say, He which soweth sparingly shall reap also sparingly; and he which soweth bountifully shall reap also bountifully. 2 Corinthians 9:6

And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not. Galatians 6:9

So what caught my attention was what we sew. We can sew the very least we can or nothing, or we can sew bountifully, above and beyond what we want or feel like.

And in Galatians it says we shall reap if we faint not.

So if we don't do well for others, or do the very least we can, we will reap very little.
But if we go above and beyond the call of duty, and do well for others even when it hurts, we will reap bountifully.

That was encouraging to me. As I have been worn out especially since the new addition of my people needing care. But the Lord gave me these verses last night, and that just helped me so much, to know that my labor is not in vain. That my fatigue and sacrifice will not be forgotten by my Lord.

Anyway, I just wanted to share. Much love to you all, and especially much prayers.

We traveled through this little town on our day trip today, this is a sign that was on their main Street. It was the most beautiful thing I have seen on this trip thus far.
I wish this was in every town , everywhere

The Lord is good, a strong hold in the day of trouble; and HE knoweth them that trust in HIM.

Nahum 1:7 KJV

May we all find strength in HIS words to get through this day.

I have a beautiful wall hanging that I read each morning as I am starting my day, "The will of God will never take you where the grace of God will not protect you" as I bump into trials and tribulations I know that HE is with me and I have nothing to fear and I know that we already have the victory, so I find it easier to ignore the lies that the enemy uses to try and cause me to stumble. May HE guide each of us this day.

Yes, HE is wonderful. HE is faithful and HE loves us, warts and all, unimaginable, yet true.

Amazing Grace!

Isthisreal- I smiled at the Giving it to the Lord and taking it back. Your words about yourself fit me well, also.
I am always asking, help thou my unbelief.

HE is wonderful!!!!

Smeshque, I understand what you mean about us interfering with The Lord. I have a terrible tendency to give it to The Lord and take it back.

Oh Lord I believe, help thou my unbelief.

I am so grateful that He knew me before the foundation of the world, He knew that I would struggle with letting go.

I love the reference of the mustard seed. I find that scripture very comforting. Thanks for reminding me. 💗

Ellery- Your faith is an inspiration, thank you so much, please share often.

NHWM- I do not know if we believers even have faith the size of a mustard seed. I think we always allow ourselves to interfere with completely trusting the Lord. But I sure am working on it.

“...I am not ashamed: for I know whom I have believed, and am persuaded that he is able to keep that which I have committed unto him against that day.” 
2 Timothy 1:12

EllerySir,

Quite a testimony you have there. You have more grace in your little finger than most of us have all of our lives. You have a beautiful love for God and humanity. Thanks for setting an excellent example for others to aspire to. I do believe there is a God who is there for us. I struggle with faith at times. I wish that I didn’t.

I don’t believe I have ever had the blind faith (or childlike faith) that you have. I’m sure you have more peace in your life than most of us do. Care to share your secrets with us? Any advice for being able to believe as you do?

Once as a child, I asked my priest if he could teach me how to have faith. I did not understand his answer to me at my young age but I do appreciate his honesty and his faith in knowing that I would someday appreciate his answer.

His response to my question was, “I cannot tell how how to have faith. It is a gift from God. You cannot earn faith or grace by anything that you do.” I do believe this to be true.

I do believe even the greatest of believers have doubts and question God from time to time and when I feel that I ‘should have’ more faith I think about how even the prophets had their dry spells and doubted our Lord.

How does one 'put God first'?

I had a wonderful experience with Him May 22, 1971 and I am still excited, still in awe of His plan for us. I have for a long time mused on these religious acts we are supposed to do.

Worship. If someone asked me to demonstrate the act of worship, what would I do?

My wife of 47 years has FTD all variants. Since 2006 at age 53. Her memory is wiped. She has no social awareness or self awareness. She cannot communicate or understand.
This may seem awful to say, but best describes the condition
She is a zombie. She shuffles all day, groaning. She will gravitate to a sound and attack. Her eyes work, but her brain does not interpret. She is hand fed cautiously as she will bite fingers or utensils. She is hydrated with a turkey baster continuously all day.
She has to be watched by a person within reach 24/7.
She cannot be restrained or contained. She is active all day and will wake in the night and wander. She will bump into walls and continue bumping until redirected.
She has to be toileted with combativeness every 2 hours.
I have been caring for by myself since 2006.
We have had no financial advantage, Christy and I worked for Walmart until she became ill in 2006. I retired at age 62 in to care for her.
Not until 2018 have I received the help needed.

God is first in that I recognize Him and give glory in the fleeting moments of recognition that Christy shows, only once, not to be repeated.
I asked a young mother once , why do babies laugh before they have learned anything. She looked at me in disbelief that I had to ask. She said "GOD".

I am thankful for the occasional laughter at whatever is in the chaos of Christy's brain, thankful that she is physically healthy and not bedridden.

I recognize His hand in everything and I am compelled to give Him the glory first for everything such as:
In 2015, we purchased a property with a manufactured home, way out in the beautiful desert, peaceful for Christy. Blessing. It was an acre on the edge of thousands of acres of protected land and it only cost $12,000.
We were concerned about the abandoned house next door, that someone noisy might move in.
Three days after move-in, our house, and all our life accumulated possessions burned to the ground, 4 feet of ash within 15 minutes.
I watched it burn and my thought was, I would rather this happened to us than someone else, because we trust God that we can recover.
The insurance did what insurance does and deceitfully compensated only a fraction of expectation.
It wasn't enough to build or purchase another house.
A surprise clause that they couldn't deny was they had to provide 6 months, 3 rooms for our 3 separate families in a luxury hotel with a gorgeous swimming pool and free weekend meals.
Meanwhile, the house next door that we were concerned about became available simply by taking over the mortgage payments for the owner, at a fraction of the worth.
We sure enjoy the spaciousness, the fruit trees, the extra MIL house, and....
the swimming pool. It is God.

We put Him first by keeping His commandment.
The Ten Commandments are great rule for living but they are fulfilled by
the greatest commandment.

Matthew 22:36-40 King James Version (KJV)
36 Master, which is the great commandment in the law?
37 Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind.
38 This is the first and great commandment.
39 And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.
40 On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.

Smeshque: Lovely, just lovely!

Rescue

You are not hidden
There's never been a moment

You were forgotten
You are not hopeless
Though you have been broken
Your innocence stolen

I hear you whisper underneath your breath
I hear your SOS
Your SOS

I will send out an army
To find you in the middle of the darkest night
It's true, I will rescue you

There is no distance
That cannot be covered
Over and over
You're not defenseless
I'll be your shelter
I'll be your armor

I hear you whisper underneath your breath
I hear your SOS, your SOS

I will send out an army
To find You in the middle of the darkest night
It's true, I will rescue you
I will never stop marching
To reach you in the middle of the hardest fight
It's true, I will rescue you

I hear the whisper underneath your breath
I hear you whisper you have nothing left

I will send out an army
To find you in the middle of the darkest night
It's true, I will rescue you
I will never stop marching
To reach you in the middle of the hardest fight
It's true, I will rescue you

Oh, I will rescue you

Lauren Daigle

Smeshque: Thank you for the scripture reminder. Yes, I, too, prefer the King James Version of the bible.

Smeshque, no but I will this weekend.😀

Llama- I cannot take credit for "nigh until death" It comes from Philippians 2:30. "Because for the work of Christ he was nigh unto death, not regarding his life, to supply your lack of service toward me."

I agree it is poetic. That is why I prefer the KJV.
IMO other translations have taken away the beauty of the old words. Kind of like if someone took Shakespeare s work and put it in street lingo, just not the same.

I hope you are having a good night.

Shell- did you get a muffin?☺️

Smeshque, Those muffins do sound good. Now I want a banana nut muffin😞

That is very thoughtful of you to make those muffins.☺

Smeshque: Those muffins sound so yummy! Well done, faithful servant!🌻🌻🌼🌼🍩🍪 Also much praise to you in taking care of mom and AB!

I hope everyone is well this evening.
Spent a lot of time today reminding myself to not grow weary in well doing. The last two days I have been so weary and the Lord has brought me through.
DH and I were going to take Mom and AB on a little road trip Thursday. But since it seems it is going to be the hottest day this week I think we are going to postpone it. Too hot for them and too hot for the dogs if we were to get out of the care anywhere. I feel bad but Lord willing maybe next week.
Mom has been taking Moringa for about a month now, and it seems to be helping her have more energy and her BP has been really good. It is really good.
We baked and wrapped individually about 300 or more different muffins, I stopped counting, for the tribes elders.(senior citizens) Every year the tribe pays for them a little trip for a week and we always send them some goodies for their journey. They have come to expect it. This year they got some cranberry almond, banana nut, pumpkin, lemon, and chocolate. I really am good if I don't have to bake for a while. But Mom sure enjoys helping. So it's all worth it.



" God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.
Therefore will not we fear, though the earth be removed, and though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea;
Though the waters thereof roar and be troubled, though the mountains shake with the swelling thereof. Selah.
There is a river, the streams whereof shall make glad the city of God, the holy place of the tabernacles of the most High.
God is in the midst of her; she shall not be moved: God shall help her, and that right early."
Psalms 46:1-5

Smeshque: That scripture verse was spot on. If the world walks after the flesh, they go down the wrong path and away from God, the one who can save them. In regard to the Dayton mass shooter, there had been signs that something was amiss with his "brain wiring," as he had said or written horrible things. Elected officials must try to catch these things before they happen. Very sad.

Smeshque: Thank you so much for your sweet and encouraging words. I really sincerely appreciate them so much! It seems like I've had a few health issues and I always think of myself as younger. Who likes aging? Your kind words truly touched me, dear Smeshque.

Send: Oh, thank you so much! You are so kind and I appreciate it. Send, you are an encouragement to so many here.

That is Lovely Send. Lovely.

I remember when Jesus was teaching in a house. A man was lowered through the roof to be healed, they were so desperate.

The family of Jesus were outside, trying to get him to come home, and were saying he is crazy.

Aging Care is my family.

Llama- you will never outlive your use on this forum. You are a great contributor. And you have much wisdom to share with others. You have such a loving heart and try and help so many, of which you do.
Never ever feel unneeded or not useful. You are quite needed and quite useful. Shine On! Llama, Shine On!