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Oh Judy, I'm so sorry. Let us know how how things r going, prayers and hugs, kimbee
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Ok I'm breathing. Beth is the woman I called that works for the county. I called to start myself to get the county to take guardianship for mom. This Beth told me someone would call me back because she just couldn't believe what she was hearing. So she picked it up herself. Apparently, (exactly what you've all been telling me) they Could have asked the county to step in to start this at any time. So now they know I've stepped in and called myself. Luckily the hops did keep mom for 2 nights and with her drs approval with social services an evaluation has been ordered. From what I understand, she refuses to sign a release for them to review her medical records. Kim, I have filled them in on the Meds abuse. And yes, the xanex abuse too. Peggy is the social worker at the facility who has been assigned to mom to oversee this. She told me understands after speaking with Beth how skeptical I am that something is being done.

Emjo: I'll see if I can explain these knots . When I come here and tell all of you what she has done to me in my lifetime, I feel such a peace with it. It is so hard telling these people the phrases, I don't know why god took Johnny instead of you. I should have drowned your ass at birth. How in gods name did I end up with a Fu***ing stupid fat ass like you for a daughter. These are things I have to tell to make them understand. They have to know why I can't be a part of her life. And every time I have to say it out loud, it just feels like it take another little chunk of my soul. I've told the sw from the cty, and the one over this evaluation. I'm done you need to figure it out. When they say I'm so sorry it cuts thru me like a knife. And I do tell them, don't you dare say that to me. I have made a beautiful life for myself, with a wonderful husband and children. I celebrate my life because I overcame. So emjo, that's the best that I can explain it. That is the last time I will speak out loud of it with these social workers. I told her I want you to know this will be unbearable if you promise me these things are being done and it isn't followed thru. After the evaluation she offered to meet with Doug and I alone with the sw from the county. So that's how Doug and I will do it. Love to you my friends, lisa
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Lisa, sorry you have those knots honey. Does it feel like a double victimization? First Your DADQM hurt u with it and then you have to be hurt again by telling them enough for them to get the real magnitude of it? Anyone would find it hard, humiliating, even embarrassing, I'd think. They r sorry to have had you relive a horrible experience so they can get the job done, but I'm sure too that they r both shocked, ashamed that the system they represent let you down andthey are surely sad to know you went through such horribleness growing up-as u know no child ever deserves that. You r the miracle and the exception: someone who put together a hard fought good life that you can be proud to celebrate! Keep being proud-you're amazingand we r proud we are your friends. Thank you for letting us in-it's an honor, Kim
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Lisa, this all sounds very encouraging. Let us hope that there are finally some professionals involved who get it. I don't blame you for being still a little skeptical and for not getting your hopes up too far. But assume that this is the real deal unless proven otherwise and go forward doing what you have to do to extricate yourself completely.

Everyone understands divorce. We don't have a comparable well-understood way for children to remove themselves from their parents. (Parents can disinherit a child.) You want your estrangement to be recognized legally. Mother is Not Your Problem. I hope that you do not have to explain the reasons to more legions of strangers. Let us hope that this is the last round. Let us hope that appointing a public guardian is the official recognition of the estrangement. And that even people with blinders on as tightly as Jane will be forced to acknowledge that DQ is Not Lisa's Problem, whether they approve of that or not.

If it turns out that DQ is not deemed to need a guardian, fine. Then she does not need you, either. Either she can operate independently or she cannot. And either way IT IS NOT YOUR PROBLEM!! Keep that firmly in mind. Repeat it as often as needed, to whomever needs to hear it. If anyone is judgmental about that, it is their problem, not yours. You are an amazing survivor.

Thank you so much for taking the time to keep us informed. You are an inspriation!
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I like the points you make Jeanne.
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Ahwwwwww: Exhale and take a deep breath. That's what I just did. Lisa, I know your mom is not your problem, but taking the step to call Social Services and get Beth involved was such a wise decision.

Your mom needs to be seen and incorporated into a system that will keep a file on her and her needs. People fall through the cracks all the time. They system is only as good as the weakest link and if you are unfortunate enough to hang your hat on someone like Jane; it's not just bad for you, it's bad for your mom.

Even though we all agree that you need to stay away from DQ, it would be hard for me to not get involved when I see the system (Jane) not taking the proper steps. After a reasonable time, the ball needs to be taken away from her. She is not worthy of the challenge and too many continue to suffer as a result.

So, I am thrilled that you took action. My heart goes out to you that you have to continually be re-victimized due to the negligence and inadequate training of some you have depended on, but taking steps to look further will save all of you needless suffering in the long run. So, GOOD FOR YOU, YOU KICK THAT BALL INTO THE END ZONE!!!!!!

If your mom does not yet meet the criteria for nursing home care, that's fine. She will eventually. If she is deemed to be able to make reasonable choices on her own behalf, that's fine and she may not get a guardian this minute. (Love how she won't release her medical records.)

Nevertheless, she's on the radar now. One of the things I would ask Beth is does the buck stop with her? Does she have the ability to be continuously kept in the loop. If your mom goes into the hospital, is she notified. Will she speak with the doctors when your mom is admitted? Is she kept abreast of what is happening at your mom's assisted living? Does Jane realize that she is going to get slapped upside the head with some tuna cans if she does not keep Beth informed? Is Beth asking and expecting that of Jane?

Every circus needs a ring leader. I hope Beth will be that person. You can support what's best for your mom while also supporting what's best for you. You just need to have that-got-it-together-go-to-person you can depend on. Maybe she has finally appeared.

You will rest easier knowing that someone is taking a role in your mom's life. It will relieve much of your anxiety. Beth sounds like someone who will treat you with respect and waste no time stepping in to the fray. She is the opposite of Jane.

You have made many wise and courageous moves over the past months. This, in my opinion, is another one. It has the potential to bring a close to the never ending saga. It may very well be a case of management now, not involvement. Beth manages the situation, you are not involved other than to let her know if things are not going according to design.

I don't know if I have said this before, but I'll risk repeating myself. All institutions, be it law enforcement, social work, medical intervention, government, etc. etc., go through trends. The goal is to look back at past mistakes and see if a different approach will work better. Sometimes the goal is just to qualify for funds to engage the next dog and pony show, but usually the ultimate goal is to do better.

Jane comes from an old school. Reunite family at all cost. Believe you can educate them, even if your mind tells you they have no comprehension of what you are saying and no ability to control their actions. Somehow they will live a better life and support each other.

Children die all the time of abuse. They die because the orphanage was impersonal and abusive and then they died because the foster home was abusive. And then they died because someone like Jane was taught to reunite and there was no escape. I could go on and on about this, but my point is no one can do much good unless they respect their gut as well as their education. Trends don't replace common sense. Maybe Beth has the attributes to see the big picture.

Take those deep breaths and try to relax. You are a kick ass WOMAN now, not a child at the mercy of a sick and cruel mother. Even if it feels that way sometimes, just look around you. Look at Beth and Jen, Doug and his amazing family. You've already made it past the finish line.

Sending you love from my heart and white light from the soul. Cattails
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Jeez, Cattails... how can anyone follow that heartfelt, well written, thoughtful comment? I'm still thinking about blue tights and tree ninjas. Well done, my friend. Lisa...what Cattails said. xxoo.
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OK getting it straight - Beth is from the county and Peggy is social services - sorry - low on sleep these days and had to nap this afternoon, and it sounds like both of them are better than J, who, in in my view, is worse than oldfashioned. IMHO, it is incompetent of her to not accept the dynamics in your family, and proceed with appointing a guardian, considering the contact she has had with the DQ and you. Hopefully she is out of the scenario that is developing now. (((((((((((((((((((((Sweetheart))))))))))))))))) I understand the pain of recalling, and voicing the perverted things your mother has said to you.There are some things my mother has said to me that I have never told anyone, and she is not as bad as yours. I pray for healing of those hurt parts. I also understand how people saying they are sorry cuts you. I have only one hand, from birth, - no doubt it didn't help mother's attitude towards me as physical perfection and things" looking right" are and obsession with her. My aunt once called it a tragedy. I refuse to accept that. Like you, I have overcome and.or learned to live with what life has handed me, be it only one hand, a BPD mother, or an alcoholic father and I don't want to be pitied, I want to be respected for what I have done with my life.
It would be totally unbearable if they don't follow through. You have had enough. I do think meeting with you, and Doug, and the sw after the evaluation is a good idea. Then you have it from the horse's mouth, or as close to as you can. I wonder if there isn't some way for at least some of her medical history to be accessed for these evaluations, but God is in charge and I believe the right thing will come about eventually. I trust Beth is keeping good records of what you have told her so it is down in black and white for perpetuity, and available for anyone concerned to read when needed.
My hat is off to you courageous lady. The cards were stacked high aganst you and you have overcome - you have KICKED ASS! This is traumatic, Give yourself some space to breath, to relax. Give yourself a treat - you more than deserve it. Experience and enjoy normality within your own family. You have my deepest respect.
Love, ((((((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))) and prayers ♥♥♥
Joan
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Judy: I haven't forgotten you. You are foremost in my mind and heart. Love, Cat
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Lisa, another way to look at having to tell 'the story' so many times, is that every time the words are spoken out loud, that have a little less power to hurt you... you are giving that abuse the sunlight.... things that are slimy like abuse, well, they just don't survive in the sunlight.... so you are more empowered... look at what you have done with your life.... how incredible.... no matter what was said, you made a great life for yourself and for your family.... so those old words and memories have less power everytime you say them outloud.... it's sorta like puking!!! getting the poison out of your body.... It will always be with you... but at some point it will be memories without all these pictures and feelings to go with it... I call it "memories without all the feelings"... and you'll get there... you are half way there now..... and as soon as you can be sure you will not have to be involveld, it will go faster and smoother... about the time you get on top of it,,, another pointless encounter of having to deal with it... but all in all, this has happened in a realativiely short amount of time.... I know it doesn't feel that way to you, you are living it... but as observers, we see you "moving like Jagger" with all this.... so, breathe the fresh air... it's getting fresher by the moment.... lots of hugs to you sister friend....
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I totally agree with ladee. I'm finding that the more I give little information of my abused childhood, the more relieved I am of not keeping it all inside. Maybe, if I keep on, one day, I will have no problem seeking therapy because I no longer fear of "opening the can of worms" of my lost childhood memories. As it is now, most of my childhood memories are so locked deep inside me, that I have no memory of it at all. What I put on these threads are just the ones that I do remember. So, it makes one wonder, how Bad can those hidden memories be????

So, I really do believe, Lisa, that if you keep telling it over and over, you will find that it no longer hurts you as much as it did before. And before that. And before that. Pretty soon - which I haven't gotten there yet - I think we will recall those bad memories with sadness - and the wastefulness of such actions from our supposed "loved ones." I hope I'm making sense.

I found this out in your thread. Remember when that commentor was so gungho religious and said that we had to be Respectful and Grateful to our parents, and feel Honor in caring for them? And I lost my temper? Then I felt bad for doing that? When I did that, I found out that I felt a little bit lighter than before.

Of course, the hateful words that DQ said about Johnny's death and you should be the one to die - that is absolutely unforgivable. Just saying those words have ended whatever normal relationship you would have had with DQ.

But you know what, you have a wonderful family and Us to help you along and to handle these stresses caused by DQ and the red tapes. Take care!! Hugs to you!
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Joan: You ARE perfect. In every way!!!!!!! Love, Cat
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Hell yeah Joan!!!!! You da bomb!!!! And still getting hit on by the younger men. Lord, if that ever happened to me, I'd have to decline. Gave up gymnastics years ago. Snicker snicker snort snort. And cat!!! What is it now? 8 days till wedding? So exciting!!!!
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Yes, 8 days to the wedding. We are leaving this Wednesday, staying overnight in Seattle and then fly out Thursday morning. Be back Monday evening. Got to find some shoes tomorrow. Then the Gma will be ready; blue tights under a flowing see through skirt, lift-up tuna cans and some stylish pumps. Hee Hee. Cat
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Omg, that's hilarious. I'm sure you will be beautiful cat. Make sure those cans not only lift but separate. You don't wanna clank walking down that aisle!!! Wear em with prize for all of us girl. I just love weddings. I swear I wish I had the nerve to be a wedding crasher. I still get teased by everyone because I took a personal day at work to watch the wedding of William and Kate. Ok, it's out. I'm a royal watcher!
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thx gals -don't forget the magic bracelets. cat and the tissues.. Even mother cries at weddings -the only time she cries.not from rage.
lisa - i don't understand the young ones, but I'lll take the attention -up to a point!
I am a royal watcher too -actually i was in the stands outside Buckingham palace for the Coronation of Queen E. in 1953. We travelled up the night before to get a place in the Canadian section. It was an amazing experience.
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Lisa: When Princess Diana married, I watched it live at 2 in the morning. I made cookies and got out a pretty tea service I had. A friend of mine came over and we watched the whole affair. Cat
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Hmmm.... I lived in England for 2 years. I stood outside the palace once but then felt pretty silly looking in the gate with the crowd. But, I did spend a lot of time in The Queens Arms, a local pub near my house. Maybe that counts? I had 13 pubs within walking distance of my house. My husband thought he'd died and gone to heaven.
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LOL judy! I was in England for 3 years and Scotland for 4 years. In 2 years you prob had more pub time than I did in 7
cat - re another thread - I am part welsh too - my paternal grandmother
it's all coming out of the woodwork now...
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MyChoice, if you would read some of the thread, you would find out that Lisa's mum is not with her any more, hasn't been for a while, and that is the best solution.
Have a good night!
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Seriously?
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Emjo, you beat me to it! xxo
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There were 1200+ Comments, I read the first page and the ones before me talking about London etc (so I wasn't aware)...I was just trying to offer a solution regarding the orginal question- and also to help others who might be in a similar situaton and were not aware of Respite
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In 1994, I went to London. I took the tour to the Windsor Castle Tour. Unfortunately, the Queen was not in residence. The tour included going inside the famous cathedral beside the castle but since I was not of their religion, I didn't feel comfortable going in it. So, I bypassed that and went straight to the Castle. Very pretty! The ceiling is very high and when you look up, it's all painted with beautiful artwork. We weren't allowed to take photos because the light from the camera's would damage the original artifacts. My very first castle! By the way, the public restrooms outside of the Castle - you have to PAY to use it! You drop a coin in the slot near each stall door, and it would unlock it....First time I ever came across a Pay-to-use toilet! We went to a pub in which the employees dressed in the olden time. Took photos of them too! I sure miss traveling.....
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If only there was a way to edit our postings, we could add in something to the original post like this:

HEY, this situation has changed A LOT, so anything you think you might tell me now is probably COMPLETELY POINTLESS.

Still feel the need to put your two cents in? NOT WITHOUT READING EVERY SINGLE COMMENT HERE YOU ARE NOT!!!

So you STILL want to try anyway, without reading ALL OF IT? Bugger Off!!!
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btw mychoice, i actually spent something like 8 hours reading every single one of Lisa's posts before i commented. and others here spent days reading EVERYONE'S posts before they did. it wasn't easy. i got so involved in the story i skipped a doctor's appt. i just felt it was courteous to do so. afterwards i took a long long nap.
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Lisa, i wish they'd put your mom in the psych ward. borderline personality disorder. narcissistic personality. histrionic personality. drug addict. i do believe she is a danger to herself and others, and THAT is the key deciding factor for any admission. she needs to be 5150'd.
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Me too cat! I taped it on VHS, and when Diana died I did the same. That would be my dream trip, but I could never wrap my head around an airplane trip that long. Too chicken.
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I'm confused. MyChoice evidently posted on Lisa's thread, but I can't find the post. I can find what I assume was her response to other comments made about her not reading the entire thread. Where did MC's first post go? Was it mean spirited?
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No, it wasn't mean spirited. She just didn't read the thread and then talked about respite and named her own company. She did this in another comment. I think her comments containing her company info had been reported (I must admit, I've had a cheese craving). Bookworm pointed out to her that this wasn't the place for self promotion and thanked her for her otherwise, good advice though, which was nice and really tactfully done.
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