I decided to start a joke discussion because we as caregivers need our load lightened. We need to laugh at our own situations and those of others to take away the sting and pain we go through. If you have a joke that's racy then give a heads up at the beginning of your post for those who might not want to read your post. We need to avoid that kind of humor. Please don't come on this thread and berate anyone for their choices of humor. This is our place to let go of criticism. Thanks for sharing!!!! ;o)
"I'm not late. I'm just early for tomorrow."
"Excuse me, I know this is hell, but may I ask which floor?"
"I came
I saw
I left early."
“Sometimes you just need to lie on the floor and do nothing for three years.”
“I’m like a kitten. I need attention and I need to curl up next to you and I need you to pet me and tell me I’m cute.”
“Nothing brightens up a room
like your absence.”
“These weekends are starting to feel like a thirty-minute lunch break.”
"Okay. So I danced like no one was watching.
My court date is pending."
"So awkward when you meet someone you've stalked
and don't know whether to play it cool
or ask whether they enjoyed Tahiti in 2011."
Ten tickles.
“Women worry about the things that men forget. Men worry about the things that women remember.”
“A man without a woman is a bachelor. A woman without a man is a genius.”
How to please a woman:
Love her
Die for her
Take her to dinner
Miss the game for her
Buy her jewelry
Be interested in what she has to say…
How to please a man:
Show up naked.
Bring beer.
One big difference between men and women
is that if a woman says, “Smell this!”, it actually smells NICE.
My DH is terrible at parallel parking. He uses valets or finds parking garages in cities .
Glad I did, I can drive big rigs because of my driving trials in that monster of a car.
Your dad did right by you, we are operating lethal weapons after all, we should know where every part is.
I learned to drive in a long station wagon .
It is a great skill to have that translates into other abilities behind the wheel. (Parallel parking, not valet. :-) I am a firm believer that everyone should know where the perimeters of their vehicle are and parallel parking makes you know.