Ever just want to tear your hair out, or someone else's? If you cannot restore a sense of balance, you will run away from home? Just want to say some things without the constraints of staying on topic? Well, this thread is for you! If you just need a short break to let it all hang out, be a brat, then come on, you can do it. No holding back! Go for it, you can do it.
Well in one week I put on 12.5 pounds in weight, felt terrible and my liver was definitely playing up to say nothing of my kidneys. Never put it down to the meds but went back to doc. She upped it straight away and within 2 days I have lost 7 pounds so it seems I am not gonna die dammit - anything would be a relief right now. But catch 22 prevails - I promised Dad I wouldn't put her into a care home so I am left doing the caring. So do I forsake my father who I adored beyond all others or do I forsake myself which I have to say is the easier option. So glad I have a DNR in place and am saving hard for that flight to Switzerland
Glad you will be getting better. Your post reminded me of Kenny Rogers' song about Tommy promising his Dad he wouldn't fight or do the things he's done, and for that he was called the "Coward of the County", which is the name of the song/story/ballad. Then, one day, due to different circumstances unforseen, Tommy had to break his promise and fight.
Let's put the seniors in jail and the criminals in a nursing home.
This way the seniors would have access to showers, hobbies, and walks, they'd receive unlimited free prescriptions, dental and medical treatment, wheel chairs, etc, and they'd receive money instead of paying it out.
They would have constant video monitoring, so they could be helped instantly if they fell or needed assistance. Bedding would be washed twice a week and all clothing would be ironed and returned to them.
A guard would check on them every 20 minutes and bring their meals and snacks to their cell.
They would have family visits in a suite built for that purpose. They would have access to a library, weight room, spiritual counseling, pool, and education.
Simple clothing, shoes, slippers, P.J.'s and legal aid would be free, on request. Private, secure rooms for all, with an exercise outdoor yard with gardens. Each senior could have a PC, a TV, radio, and daily phone calls.
There would be a board of directors to hear complaints and the guards would have a code of conduct that would be strictly adhered to.
The "criminals" would get cold food, be left all alone and unsupervised with lights off at 8 p.m., showers once a week, living in a tiny room, pay the assisted living costs of nearly $5000 per month and have no hope of ever getting out.
Justice for all."
Also, for any too too soft-hearted daughters out there, this behavior modification stops short of mean or abusive. I am going to have tuna sandwiches today too, because I like them.
Kimber, I am not authorized to give Brat Awards, but how about it peeps, wasn't she a good Brat?
I do think you will have more options open up to you other than breaking your promise to your Dad, or anyone going to prison. For starters, can you access the respite program again until you are feeling better? I recall, I hope correctly, when your Mum was in hospital/rehab, she was improved?
Song" "I promise you Dad, not to go to prison, cause Mum would have to go too!"
It started with a police procedural (mother was big on crime fiction) - successful TV series, much acclaimed, brilliant reviews. And, excuse me, but even making allowances for my tolerance threshold being already low because of mother's edits and corrections every other page - far more irritating than the errors themselves would have been - this book is TRASH. It is rubbish! Four hours that robbed me of. I will not inflict it on another.
Next was an Aldous Huxley. I don't care how bloody celebrated he is, I never much cared for 'Brave New World' and this next work, can't even remember its name, hit the bin halfway through the first chapter.
And at last I've worked my way up to a hardback. By someone called Llewellyn, a tale of international finance, espionage and assassination. Chapter 3, I have absolutely no idea what is going on or who all these people are, but you won't blame me: I quote...
"I went into the beam-ceilinged bar, hooked with hams, warm in smells of casks and a generous kitchen, candles on tables, shining on bottles and racks of glasses, and in the barmaid's wedding ring. But I - in that recurrently terrifying dream - saw another, narrower, of diamonds, heard a magnificent basso choir, walked through a church blazing in the stained-glass palette of the Caribbean sun, sniffed a bouquet of lilies of the valley, felt Consuelo's fragrant pliancy, knew, held, crushed."
Is Consuelo ever a girl's name anywhere? Consuela, surely? But that aside, there are another 300 pages like this and the decade is drawing to its close. See this book sail through the air and into the waste paper basket. The crime was the writing style and the mystery was how it ever got published. Solved it now though!
In my heart of hearts I do feel sort of guilty for my brat behavior, but my stepmom had a good laugh and said not to feel bad.
Anyway - I'm not condoning abuse. I just felt that a grown man who deliberately pushes buttons should reap some "rewards" for doing so. THat being said, I told my stepmom I just can't keep doing the weekends - my son's activities are stepping up, & I get so ANGRY. Bless all of you out there that take this abuse E V E R Y S I N G L E D A Y.
Humans at every stage of life are held accountable for their actions.
In my opinion only, and in certain cases, when a patient's behaviors become detrimental to the health and safety of another person, this cannot continue.
I don't have the answers, but somebody will.
I have a brand new lovely car
It is my pride and joy
We bought it to get mum around
So its partially her toy
Today the sun shone brightly
So I suggested we go out
Lets go by the foreshore
Her yes was nearly a shout
Now do you need the loo I said
As you would asked a rather small child
NO I DONT And don't ask me again
Oh Gosh I have made her wild
AGAIN
Now the shore is about 2 minutes away
With cafe and facilities nearby
Just tell me why she had to 5H1T herself
Tell me why oh why
So I took her to the disabled loo
And there I cleaned creamed and changed her
She was very cross with me
Because she seemed to think Id made her
POO!
Well I was mad and rightly so
And perhaps this story should stay untold
But it did rather make me smile
When the only water I could use was COLD
Was that over the top?
Worked an 11 hour day yesterday and got to mom's memory care late to find her in bed in her clothes - took her potty and get her ready for bed but could tell she wasn't going to go back to sleep
Regular evening nurse was off and sub said she already had her meds early with my private caregiver which sounded odd so a late nite text to my caregiver who said no not even Tylenol so back down the hall who grudgingly checks med cart and says oh here they are
So back down the hall and now mom is in the hall in her diaper saying her roommate is going to kill her and she won't go back in her room - took another 45 minutes to settle her down including me lying in bed with her so she'd fall asleep
seems staff left a walkie talkie in mom's room and she could hear them all talking but didn't see anyone and it freaked her out
Guess where I put that walkie talkie?
Congrats your bratness!
Now I also always check mum is awake enough to have a shower. A fall in a shower whilst getting into or out if the seat could be pretty drastic. This morning she wasn't fine but this afternoon yep wanted the shower and hair wash well would allow the hair wash. Got her into shower did everything I needed to and then just as she was getting out she decided to sit down for goodness sake.
Not a fall but a sit down. Are you on strike I asked or is this a sit down protest?
Im still waiting for my dinner...yeah right.....so I let her sit there and got her a sandwich ....which she promptly ate and then was able - with a lot of help - to get up. Sometimes it is easier to go with the flow except that I have now done the back in....perhaps I should just not shower her and get someone in to do it - oh lawdy she would hate that - hmmmm must make arrangements for that then!
Just move her into the shower/loo/now dinng area for good? Put a t.v. in there too?