My 88 year old mother with Alzheimers has been living with us for 6 weeks now after being in a nursing home for 2 years. I was not able to see her day to day activity level when she was there but in the 6 weeks here she is sleeping increasingly more and I am wondering if this is part of the normal progression. I had started to feel guilty letting her sleep so much but we are now seeing that she gets cranky and more symptomatic and even less independant in her thinking if she doesnt get all that sleep. I am wondering if this is normal to see and if I should just let nature take it's course.
I actually believe that was a blessing as opposed to laying in a bed staring at the ceiling.
As hard as it is to accept, your father is clearly telling you that he's going, sooner rather than later. Please don't make dad feel guilty for it. Find your own peace with it, and make the last days (which, btw, could be YEARS still) filled with love and caring. If you still want to increase his activity, turn everything you do with him into a kind of game, with veiled purposes. Examples .. If he's still ambulatory, serve dinner at the table and get him to walk to it; if he's chair/bed bound get him to push and pull more and more to reach for things he wants/needs. Use your imagination. My charge, Edna, can't really stand or walk by herself, so needs our assistance: when she's rising or sitting from one place to the other, I reach around to hold her as she begins moving and when she's half way up (or down), I'll say, oops .. hang on a sec, I need a better grip, getting her to use her own muscles to rise and sit. I'll offer her my hand to help, and let HER do most of the lifting/pulling. You get the idea.
Otherwise, make him as comfortable as possible. Follow HIS lead.
Just my 2-cents worth.
LadeeC
One of the things we use is a 'adjustable & variable pressure air mattress' (got it from Amazon for under $80) for the bed. The thing is a godsend. Edna sleeps FLAT on her back for the night and pretty much sits in her recliner for the rest of the day, so the pressure at her coccyx area is almost constant. During the day, we can, and do, reposition her .. even slight changes of position change the pressure points .. but it wasn't enough. With the air mattress, you can change the firmness and the pump very slowly fills and unfills the chambered waffle pattern so that she never has the same pressure points for more than a few minutes. For us, that means we can actually sleep at night, without having to roll or change her position every two hours. We're on contiguous 24 hour shifts (4 days for me, 3 for my roomie), so we HAD to come up with a solution or go mostly sleepless during our 'shift'.
Since she's also incontinent, we've also come up with our own little 'butt butter' that we use to protect the skin: 3 parts petroleum jelly (could use A&D ointment), 1/2 part diaper cream (with the highest zinc oxide content we can find) and 1/2 part perineal-safe lotion (like baby lotion). I also save the soft, cloth-like wrappers that the incontinence pads are wrapped in, cut them in half, and use it as a bandage/barrier between buttocks and underwear, so that the cream isn't absorbed by the material. Her butt looks like a 2 year olds. Works like a charm for us.
These aren't really solutions to help with the actual turning process, but more like preventives from NEEDING to turn so often. Hope this helps!
I feel that she is tired cause she put a lot of work in her health and is time to feel relax and be pamper she deserve all the attention she can get. she had a healthy life and she took care of others and now she is being taking care of for all the good deed she did. I love her so dearly.
At this point, I've accepted the fact that she is comfortable with this weird sleeping schedule of hers, and refuses to do anything to correct it - so I just deal with it. I have tried to convince her to have another sleep study done or to pursue the issue with other doctors, but she won't do it.
The only thing I would add is if you or dad has any religious connections maybe have some one from his faith come in and give him the opportunity to feel the closeness of the Lord. Love goes a very long way and your love is something that helps him end his life so peacefully. Keep talking to him, just tell him your thoughts and what has happened during your day at work. Hugs and Blessings to you
is absolutely brilliant, and Im so thankful to Him for all the help that I receive.
In relation to Mom, I intend to go the distance caring for My Mother at home where She's happiest and most content, for as long as is possible. I know the time will come as the Alzheimers progresses when it will not be possible for Me to continue to do so, as Mom will require professional care in the relative later stages. When I think back at all the sacrifices My Mother made for all of the Family, and Me and the wonderful Companion and best Friend Mom has been to
Me throughout My entire life, I would be heartless and terrible ungrateful NOT to
do so. I wish all You Care givers the very best, keep up the great work, plus hugs and kisses to all Who You Care. God Bless You all. From John in Bandon, Ireland.
There will be help available from visiting nurses etc who will teach you the basics of home nursing and probably bathing aides who will visit several times a week. There a lot of instruction videos on utube to teach you the basics.
Come back here when you have a question. I am sure some one will have had a similar experience.