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Is there a non-painful way to bang one’s head against the wall?
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THANK YOU!
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Sassy and sounhappy,

I hope things improve soon for you.
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Why can’t I have some months of calmness…New problems now.
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Sassy, you need an exit plan.
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Any one long time caring for a parent who is narcissistic and manipulative living with them? My fault because I searched acceptance and over showered her to be good enough. Even though she is bedridden she is critical even of how much attention I give my dog. She has controlled every part of my life by pointing out every short coming she feels I have. The last couple of years she has driven away my kids, my friends and now my husband is pretty near through. I have nurses 2 times a day to assist 7 days a week. She grows weaker physically but is mentally very strong. Needing the constant care of a baby we are have missed the whole last year of holidays, birthdays and gradulations. I am so stuck there is not a day I do not cry and really even find it hard to reason with going on. I do have a social workers for support but in the end there is no point of talking about because there is no other way. There is no money for assistance living or assistance living. There is no help from my sister because her words Mom's life changed not hers. I look in her face and I am so sad to see her health failing. She was always so strong. Every day is hard. I feel sick to my stomach every day. Sleep as much as I can to get away and no desire to do anything but go through the motions of living. My husband is getting completely frustrated that we can do nothing or go anywhere. I know people say get a sitter and go out for the evening but what I really really want is to get up in the morning without worry of what this day will bring. Be able to sit, relax, watch tv or read a book with my husband without always having to get up. More then anything I want peace. I have been a full time care giver for my Mother for over 20 years all but the last six months completely without help. I do not know even no me because it has always been about her. I know there is nothing anyone can say but I hope that I am not alone in these feelings and that I am not a terrible person; just exhausted.
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My father died just shy of his 75th birthday and his funeral was a few days after that, I don't know the exact days. A lot of us have birthdays around that time so that's what I choose to remember, that and the fact there was a frigging spring blizzard on the day of his funeral.
Mom died in early October, I could probably pinpoint the day if I tried but... I know I came home and busied myself by cleaning up falling leaves.
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My dad passed on his 97th birthday which happened to be Ash Wednesday. Need, mom lost her mom at age 5 as did my father. He was raised by siblings and his grandfather. He was a great man though. Had his faults but patient and kind.
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Order one for all of us 😊.
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Is there such a thing as a 1-month pass (free of any problem in the world)? I’d like to order a few passes please. Thank you very much.
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Thanks, Llama

I was surprised that grandma shared it with me. I was in my 20’s when she told me that. She rarely spoke about anything sad. She was young when she lost her mom. Her dad remarried many years later.

I know that you were young when you lost your dad. That’s so hard to lose a parent when you’re younger.

My mom didn’t know her mom’s mother. She died before mom was born.
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Need,Llama,Way

Very touching. Certain anniversaries can be very hard.
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Way: You're very welcome and thank you for your kind words.
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Llama,

Thanks, so sorry for your losses as well . I feel that it’s two days some years also due to a holiday not always being the same date . (((hugs))))
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My daddy left this world on Good Friday, 1967. Good Fridays are rough days for me ×2 because they're not always on March 24.
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Way: I am sorry for your loss of your mother on Thanksgiving Day.
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Need: You're welcome. Yes, most certainly I did. Thank you. So sorry that your grandmother lost her mom on New Year's Eve.
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My mother died on Thanksgiving Day .
It’s not enjoyable anymore.
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Thanks, Llama. I know that you went through heartache watching your mom decline too.
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My grandmother who rarely complained about anything, once confided in me that she hated New Year’s Eve.

I asked her, ‘Grandma, how can you hate New Year’s Eve?’

She said, “It seemed like the whole world was celebrating the upcoming New Year and I was sad because my mother died on New Year’s Eve.”
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Need: Hugs. That was hard.
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Riverdale: Yes, my birthday is January 13. My mother had suffered an ischemic stroke a week before and she passed away on January 24. No birthday cards for me. Before my brother flew all the way across country while mother lay on her death bed, he gave me a gift of a calendar, not even gift wrapped.
Sorry for your loss.
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My mom died just before our wedding anniversary. I was hoping that she wouldn’t die on our wedding anniversary.
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This is really here nor there and I can't believe I just realized that my mother died on the same day of a month (different one) that I was born on. Has anyone else experienced a similarity in their lives?

My late MIL died on the very same day and month as her late husband (who I never met) but 39 years later.

Anyway daughter and son in law came home from week to Netherlands (loved it there) and I no longer have to be referee between 3 and 5 year old grandchildren which is a relief as my husband and I have different viewpoints (we agree) on raising children.
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Saw a sitcom the other day, where a man said:
Did you know that sandwiches were named after a guy called the Earl of Sandwich?

I thought it was a joke. Turns out it’s true!

(1718–92), an English nobleman said to have eaten food in this form.
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My experiment below, isn’t really working. Turns out it’s very hard to break a life-time of go-to habits. I’ll try again today.
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Random thought:
Imagine waking up one day, and thinking that every one of your decisions in life, until now, was wrong.

By the way, I don’t mean: your husband/wife, kids, being nice, being polite, etc. (Those decisions are not part of what I’m talking about).

But imagine you try totally different decisions. I think I’m going to try, just for fun.

So for example: I hate tomatoes. From today (for 1-month experiment), I’ll eat tomatoes now and then. I’ll read books I would normally never read. I’ll start some hobby that’s totally not part of my personality normally.

1-month experiment. I’ll see how it goes.
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venting,

Enjoy it while it lasts! 😊
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Need, I’m only up here a few more days. Then I have an appointment to go to. I’m meeting Way at Bingo, at the facility for broken-down caregivers.
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cw,

That’s our issue. The humidity is awful!
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