Hope you are all having a good xmas! I hope next year will be easier for us all here!
I just want this year to end, this year was hard and xmas was awful so sad for us all and miss Dad so much dont think it really has sunk in yet!
Thanks for all your kind words and support!
XX Kazza
I think every year I am like the Scrooge and every year some Christmas magic happens and lifts me up with joy and love. I wanted to feel that love and joy but I was so angry and depressed from dealing with an angry aging mom. After going to a Unitarian service Christmas even, I could feel the love and hope clear away my dark clouds. I longed to be with two of my best friends. One of them I have longed for him to be my love, but he has always chosen friendship. I wasn't sure if he was going to take the time out to drive 4 hours for a few days to be with me, but he did and I was so happy it all worked out as it did. I had a nice little vacation from caregiving and am fortified with love and joy again. My friends gave me love and support and I was able to give back to them also. Tonight I celebrated New Year's eve with my mother and was nervous at first not knowing what it would be like.
We ate a very simple meal, watch the classic movie channel and had a nice time. Without the drama of usual interaction, we managed to have pleasant time. That's a good way to bring in the New Year! And when I step out of the picture (and thank God she is healthy enough that I can) she has found some other helpers and avenues to become more independent. Perhaps then she can not feel so driven to do her angel-demon trips with me and others. We'll see. At least I had a break!
I hope you have a Happy New Year - along with everyone else on this site.