Hi AC Forum,
I feel like I run the gamut of emotions on a weekly basis. I think that is a difficult side of this caregiving. Not being able to fully satisfy - or not being able to satisfy for what should be a normnal period of time. And on the same token know that each day you go down this path you just running to the finish line.
It's the craziest and horrible life as I am not able to live my life, yet I have a hard time thinking of my mom living with less. Also not being the face of which she says to at first seeing her and asking her how she is, "Better now that I see you!" Knowing that you are the comfort in their sight. Yet what it takes from one feels enormous - emotionally, monetarily, physically.
How are you doing?
LastOne
forget my issues with mom.
Hope this helps some of you who are at the end of your rope like I was..Now I just laugh it off!! Thanks for reading..Just wanted to spread the word about the Beloved John P.
On a humourous lighter note, I love the name Heart2Heart, it reminds me when I was a child and my Mom's mother (gramma) would come to visit, if I was misbehaving, she would look me sternly in the eye and say, "Young lady, we are going to have a heart to heart talk!" Of course that would be enough to start the tears streaming down my cheeks because I knew she was not happy with me. I can laugh about it now and even Mom gets a kick out of it when I remind her. 😊
I have been in a similar situation with my brothers, so I understand... After so many years of hoping things would be different, I have finally let go... This release actually released me from always 'wanting' them to 'be' different people, but now I understand they can't 'be' different people... and, you can't change people... Remember to take some deep breathes Rainey (every day)... even I have to take my own advise.
We'll make it...
*BIG HUGS* Thanks for understanding and validating my feelings, sorry you have experienced the same thing, yeah we will make it, one way or the other, we will survive. I try to listen to what my body and mind tells me now my body is telling me to climb in bed, read a book and escape for a while. Feel free to reach out anytime!
You are an amazing daughter. I can identify with so much of you what you are writing about. I know its hard being the strong one. The good one. And having your siblings dump everything on you. I'm so sorry. I know you are doing the very best you can. It is overwhelming. I hope you can find some respite care. And try to find some time for yourself. My father has since passed away but reading other's stories has given me comfort.
You are too young to have 'all' this stress on your shoulders. I once asked my youngest brother how he ever studied in a disfunctional family (after I left... he was left alone). He said when he studied he "closed his bedroom door" (he went on to get double degree with a Masters). I hope you can close the door (and, your mind) more often, so you can concentrate and focus on your life. There is absolutely no reason for you to feel guilty (nothing you can do will change this situation with your mother and grandmother). I also hope you can go out with a friend (or friends) once in a while (make it once a week!), because you absolutely need a social network in your own age group for you to thrive and be healthy. As difficult as this all is for you, you 'need' to start a life of your own... step by step (but, start now). You have your life before you. It's your birth right... Be Happy... and, Best Wishes for a successful degree and career! Blessings.
🍰🎼
All that balancing has to be very difficult and exhausting. I hope you can get in some good hours of sleep. Blessings to you and your mom...
😇🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹😇