I have been a private person most of my life coming and going as i please, now I have my mother walking in my room whenever ....even when I"m sleeping and it is really creepy!! I never got along with her and now I find myself living in Fla taking care of her. I try my best to keep up a nice attitude but I loose it alot when I get to many questions....where are you going...when you coming home....why why why!! She is not that bad yet but telling the cleanest women in the world to go take a shower, wash your hair, and change your clothes is frying my brain, what ever is left of it.I know it's only going to get worst but being down here from Philly, not having a job is starting to worry me. I also have had health issue since I have been here and I know it is from stress. I lost a lot of weight and when I tell her I need to gain weight because I'm so stressed out she says what are you stressed about?! Oh boy somebody help!
If your mom needs it, there are places that are more hands on too. Has your mom had any kind of an evaluation to see what her needs are?
I thought I acted as quickly as possible, but it still took a toll on my health. I lost tons of weight, which I don't really mind, but also had other health problems. It's like things just popped up suddenly due to the stress and anxiety. I had to have a root canal, see an orthopaedic doctor, suffered digestive issues, etc. Stress can do terrible things to your body.
Just note that not all of us are cut out to be Caregivers, and there is nothing wrong with that. We all have different personalities and different barometers when it comes to having patience. And yes, stress will cause major health issues, I know, it happened to me and I am not even a hands-on in the same household caregiver. I cannot imagine what you are going through.
Get out a calendar and mark a date where you will be calling the Council on Aging and getting some advice on what to do, and calling Medicaid [if your mother qualifies] to see what options they have for either home care or continuing care facilities.