Always is when I go away for the weekend with my family...
You can guarantee when I come back he's "been ill". EVERY TIME. So I phoned him - first sentence "I've been ill". Like its my fault because I went away!
STILL not taking all his medication that the GP gave him so I offer ZERO sympathy. Basically, wants me to tell him how he can feel better - "Take the meds the GP has given you Dad, if that fails then go an see you're GP but I'm not a doctor."
His words - "I desperately need you to visit the weekend." "I've got no food in the house" (Brother lives literally 5 mins drive from him - I live 35-40 mins. Brother is probably laying low). Anyway, he knows my car is in the garage so I'm struggling for transport and he knows my wife works weekends so may need our other car. So I tell him I can't promise. Anyone would have thought I'd told him I'd murdered the family next door.
Apparently, I'm "letting him down" and "need to arrange something", and "wife needs to understand". Of course the standby offer of home delivery groceries is not good enough - he doesn't want to spend the £30 minimum - they have to be hand delivered by me!
I've tried setting boundaries, I've said no can do, I've tried ignoring, I've tried just not doing. Give him his due he's relentless in his quest to get me to do what he wants!
I am only referring to what is considered ‘politically correct’ these days. Gee, I was trying so very hard to cover all the bases and report what was said historically when I was a child. We only knew to say Indian. The old westerns on television were about cowboys and Indians. Yes, it was the ‘Hollywood version.” I am sure much of it wasn’t accurate. I had a huge crush on Clint Eastwood!
You are certainly free to call yourself whatever you desire and not feel any shame. That is your business.
Thanks for telling me how you personally feel. I appreciate it. We are all walking on eggshells these days. All I have ever wanted was to live in harmony with others.
I was only responding to Paul’s comments. I am not telling anyone else how to feel. I happen to agree with Paul and was telling him that.
People are free to feel any way they choose to.
The very last thing I am trying to do is stir up a controversy. So no need to read anything more into it. I am very much a live and let live person as long as no harm is done to others.
I can see how you would choose Florida as a place to live. My dad grew up in Florida. He wasn’t near Disney. He was near the beach, which I love! He was near Panama City Beach. Love that white sand and the beautiful Gulf of Mexico. We went every summer in my childhood. My husband and I took our children many times. They like Disney too. My youngest daughter likes Universal better than Disney.
Daddy met mom when he was stationed in New Orleans during his military days. Mom was very beautiful and he followed her and introduced himself to her. My dad was really handsome as a young man in uniform. They fell in love and he decided to stay in New Orleans.
Mini-skirts: didn't go to Catholic schools, but our school had a limit. One girl was sent home to put a longer skirt on (for those who are too young to experience this, we were NOT allowed to wear pants back then!) - her longest was still too short! I would take my hems up, mom would take them down, so my solution was like yours. Never worse a dress again, just skirts, get on bus, pull shirt tails out and roll up that waistband! Kids are usually smarter than their parents realize!
Hahaha, you made me laugh out loud with your skirt story. Yep! It was the mini skirt era! My mom would tell me if I dropped something not to bend over!
Yep, Rowdy Yates. I liked a lot of Clint’s old stuff. Remember that movie that he did, ‘Play Misty for Me?’ I was a teenager when that was shown at the movie.
Oh gosh, I drooled over Clint Eastwood. He was so good looking! I always went for dark haired guys. I did make exceptions for Robert Redford and Paul Newman.
Clint’s son looks so much like him as a young man.
Oh my gosh! That is not professional to wear hot pants to work! LOL 😂
I remember hot pants! Every generation has their own clothing style.
Did you make halter tops out of scarves? I did!
Did you go to your school dances? Remember those dresses? Proms, homecoming and so on.
Do you go to your school reunions? I only went to one of them. I do have friends that I have stayed in touch with since kindergarten.
Hahaha, just chit chat while he was away. Different time zone for us.
I can't make a comment without you coming unhinged.
I suppose when someone wants to attack another any excuse will do.
No one said that you can't say it, I said they will correct you every time. They are Indian they don't like it when people refer to them as native american.
As usual you jump on me before you actually read what I wrote.
Sorry Paul, didn't mean to hijack your thread. Just pointing out how politically incorrect some political correctness can be.
But hey guys just chill a bit. FWIW - I have no idea with the Native American/Indian thing to be honest. (although if someone is Indian in the uk it means from India lol).
The gun thing - not getting into that. I love Florida and the USA. Its different to the UK got to respect the different culture. Would I move there? Hmmm Florida is a bit too - not sure I could cope to be honest! I look forward to cold weather and rain at home!
He'd been ill for a week or so. Nothing severe but not nice if you're old I guess, nasty cold/flu. He'd called the doctor out twice who pretty much told him, he didn't need antibiotics he needed to just rest. He wasn't having that.
So he called an ambulance told them he couldnt breathe. They took him to hospital. 3 hours later they sent him home - he was fine and they agreed with GP.
So hes phoning me ranting and raving. They had, despite his requests, refused to admit him. Dad I'm not a doctor but I'm sure they know what they're doing. He was really mad. Going on how hes so ill that he needs to be in hospital.
Next day I get a call from the hospital. Hes banged his head, fallen and been admitted. Not a serious wound but they kept him in hospital. Of course, since he was there they let him stay for a few more days (wrong I guess but hey ho).
Anyway, one of the nurses spoke to me. The wound did not tie up with his story. Something about hitting his head on high level cupboard door. The small wound was on the top of his head and did look as if he'd somehow stood underneath and raised his head up and moved it back and fore (which nurse thought).
Of course, theres no way he'd admit it. It just worked out so well for him - he'd gotten admitted as he wanted all along.
I spoke to the hospital and his GP after this. Nothing ever got done.....
6 months later same thing happened. Again - this time GP refused to come out and ambulance refused to come. Next thing hes fallen. Once again, day after he'd been moaning about it all.
Again, I spoke to hospital and GP - nothing got done...
So, to this day, I'm 99% certain these were fake. Not 100% but it all worked out so well for him both times. This is one of the reasons why I know that hes likely to try anything if he can see that me not visiting is becoming an emergency in his head.
I'm an IT geek working in a government office though....
Don't tell me I'd have to wear a suit to work in the US lol.
Could he? Sure. But, what is going to stop him? About all that *might* is having paul living there on 24/7 call... NOT. So, it's his life, he's been deemed competent, let him do whatever his little heart desires. You do your thing.
IF he were ever of a mind to listen and learn, I would tell him his methods are NOT going to work and he shouldn't try it this way. I'd say feigning needing help with something, buying supplies, being ill is NOT how to get someone to be happy to visit. It's also crying wolf, and if/when you really DO have a need, no one is going to pay any attention! IF you want a visit, just ASK for a visit and leave the rest of this crap by the wayside.
Of course, we know he isn't going to listen or learn...
So, you do your thing, and visit/help when you deem the time is right. If he's ill or hurt (or pretending either), as you know you aren't a doc and you are too far away to handle that anyway, so let it go. He doesn't like it, tell him to hire someone or move to a place where they have people who will respond to every beck and call (at least until they get fed up with it too!!!)
I truly did not mean any offense to anyone. Was only trying to cover all the bases. People are welcome to feel any way they choose.
Paul,
Some places have a strict dress code, others don’t. Then there is ‘casual Friday’ where people don’t dress in suits. Our sports teams are so popular that people wear team jerseys on game days.
A lot of people have trouble adjusting to the heat and humidity. I don’t know how people dealt with wearing suits years ago before air conditioning! We didn’t have air conditioning at my school when I was a kid. Somehow we survived. I think California has the best weather! Cost of living is so expensive there though.
I know that you go to DisneyWorld but you should visit Disneyland sometimes in California. We have done both. Of course, DisneyWorld is bigger but Disneyland is the original and fun to see. You can really feel the vibe of Walt Disney and the weather is fantastic! The California beaches are so beautiful too if there is time to extend the trip.
"...halter tops out of scarves" Nope, TMI, but too small for halter tops really...
...dances, proms, reunions, nope.
FWIW - in a college class, reading "A Rose for Emily" written in 1930, one (or more) classmate(s) took offense at the "N" word used in it, and felt it should be changed. Good lord, it was "acceptable" back then! What are we supposed to do, paint over nudes in artwork and dress statues because it offends our definition of "decency"? Rewrite/edit all the classics that might have "offensive" words or actions in them? This was a second degree for me, so it was early 2000's!!! It is what it is, and yes, I agree, in more recent times too many people are being offended by things, even innocent things taken out of context.