My mother is 86, has an artificial heart valve and on coumadin, and has metastatic colon cancer currently being treated with oral chemo. She fell a few weeks ago at home, and ended up in hospital and now in chemo. Is told she needs to go home with help, or to assisted living, and is refusing - says she wants to live her life and doesn't have the money (she would have to spend down what's left, but she could if she wants to). She thinks she is very sharp and shows good judgement but is very difficult and has does not show good judgment at all. I've told her I will not take her home to be without help - she says I am "controlling". She doesn't want to spend the money, and thinks she is going to drive (she's on Percocet for pain) and do whatever she wants. I'm out of things to say to her without total frustration. She is being released Tuesday and so far there's no plan, because she has refused home health care or assisted living. I'm out of ideas and very angry. No reasoning with her at all.
She was so stubborn, she refused to see a doctor at all in about 50 years. CI went to the house and transported her to the hospital to be checked.
Having power of attorney is a huge help and should be done ASAP if you haven't already. We have just recently made the decision to place her in 24 hour care. (another new road for us)
The past 2 years have been HECK ! . She refused to believe she cannot do some things and as a result has broken her nose, her wrist, her teeth, gone to the ER three times ,and now is having much difficulty using any of the daily living skills. We realize we can no longer care for her. Partly the stubborness and partly the horrible disease she has. Sad but necessary. It is a hard road and I wishg you the best. Hope I was of some help .
I know what a big chore this can be, but it can be done and you can do it. Good luck!