Many of us, myself included, come from a dysfunctional family which adds a lot of weight to the challenges of caregiving. I have read stores on various threads on other topics and decided it would be good to have a thread just for this topic for people to share, vent and discuss.
The idea for this thread originated on the thread named "The Caregiver....How are YOU doing today?"
"We treat you like family!"
Yup,
NOT going in there.
Im wondering if in there contract it says something
Can someone be thrown out of assisted living if they constantly live in clutter which they keep increasing?
scampie (((((hugs))))
bundle - good ones
I'm glad things are wrapping up for you.
But sometimes I’d like to take them off and beat somebody with them.
I’ve been through a lot of stuff…
I still have nightmares about them from time to time. My fibromyalgia is flaring up due to the damp weather here in DC.
Al-Anon was my saving grace, and all of the long time members have passed on and just a few of us from our old groups are still around.
from everyone.
🙂 i'm stuck between a rock
and someone i want to hit it with.
I never ever wanted anything from my mom, but I always wanted what is best for her.
My younger brother who is POA, mom must of done a quick sale, because my brother is on the deed also.
When he did something, like the roof he acted like he was God, "I do this I do that" . It's his darn house!!
His house that he is really ruining at this point. Never put the gutters back up, after he did part of the roof. Now there is mold in the basement, an addition ceiling fell in and it was fixed but never painted been like that for 2 plus years. The shingles from the roof are illegally dumped in the back yard. Gutters from the other part of the house completely full and more mold. He paid to have a shower put in but the bathroom is still all torn apart, for 6 months.
And he is off boating all weekend every weekend with my ex. Many trees dead, one that will knock her power out when it goes
The worst part is Mom will never be able to go to an AL or a decent NH, now. And I'm sure this is why my sister disappeared.
I know he has health issues from 911, and serious PTSD, and we are taught to look up to those who serve are country but......
Just needed some venting
It makes me sad that mom is living this way
We and my wife's sister have a financial investment person. We have our finances in order as retired people. Do we need some other kind of financial person to help us organize to move into a continuous care place?
The only thing that sis and I need to do is set up our residences to sell.
We are not ready to move yet, but many of the people at these continuous care places sound like vultures. They want a decision today when I am just doing research. As I explained to one person, they want me to defend a doctoral dissertation before I have even prepared the proposal and had it approved.
Correction.
I meant to say that Narcolepsy is not curable. It is only treatable.
My sons and sis are concerned about this and she watches me like an eagle. Thus, her new nickname, eagle eye. My wife, however, is used to seeing me and sis as the strong ones. Thus, she doesn't see what the rest of us see in myself or in sis. Sis is a stage 4 ovarian cancer survivor from back in 2000 with complications related to her treatment. We are no longer the mighty warriors that we once were. We are the same team that we became over several decades. We are prepared and rather certain that at some point, we are together going to just have to take charge for everyone's benefit and our own survival. This reciprocal platonic relationship is a great blessing. It is by far the deepest platonic relationship that I've ever experienced, but that out of necessity. We have been the mental health jedi of the family and each of us feel like going to an island far far away like Luke Skywalker did. We are not depressed like he was. We are tired. She tries to make my life easier as much as she can and I do the same. Recently, things developed such that she's invited me to the empty duplex next to her when I feel a need to escape.
Thanks for listening to this cranky old man. My psych says that I have earned the right to be a cranky old man at this point. Maybe so.
I am having to wait until June. My SIL, my wife and I are looking for a place in Greensboro, NC for the three of us to move to for continuing care, i.e. independent living, assisted living, and nursing home at some point.
Out of necessity, Sis, as I call her, and I are taking on the majority of this task. She has already had some interaction with Moses Cone hospital there and as a cancer survivor needs such a place. During our chat, I did a quick search for neurologists who specialize in narcolepsy. Wow! They have 4 whereas Duke only has 1 or 2. I am calling that place in the morning to see if my PC can refer me to a doctor there and they can see me sooner. Two years ago, Duke Hospital and Moses Cone Hospital were ranked equally.
THANK YOU for being your amazing self!
🙂🙂🙂🍀🍀🍀🐾🐾🐾
🐶🐶🐶
"Make room for the right people to enter your life by clearing out those who don't belong."
"It’s good to be a shoulder, cheerleader, friend, or support system; but remember, you deserve as good as you give.” Liz Faulblas
We know this, but who gets it and from where?
“There’s nothing simpler than avoiding people you don’t like. Avoiding one’s friends, that’s the real test.”
“Don't take advice from people who don't have to live with the results.”
My sister-in-law is driving down on Tuesday to take all of us on a retreat that she wants all of us to attend. She is doing all of this driving because I should not drive and the pain meds that my wife takes make it illegal plus unwise for her to drive. Or that is what her pain doctors say.
My sister-in-law and I are the strong ones in this family. We have been through thick and thin plus had each other's backs for decades. However, our strength is declining. My wife, her identical twin sister, is upset that the source of her security is no longer Rambo and Super Woman. Well, we aren't.