Mother has dementia and rapidly declining mental health and physical health. She is frequently agitated and verbally abusive, she doesn't remember these outbursts. She is unsafe by herself and unaware fully, of her own safety. She skips medications and meals and is often paranoid. She is incontinent of urine. Cannot accomplish activities of daily living. Refuses to consider medications for her behavior and dementia issues because she does not recognize them.
I can no longer care for her in the home, I have psoriatic arthritis (in hands and feet). I am waiting for a judicial disability review with a judge. I have at least a year longer to wait for that. I am in College to get an associates degree for medical billing and coding, I can no longer work as a nurse. I am sleep deprived and emotionally and mentally exhausted. This puts mother at risk also, because she is living and depending on someone who can no longer care for her. She refuses and mention of facility care. My siblings want what she wants and will not listen to me regarding what she needs. I need to protect myself and mostly her. I have reached out to her physician, who said for me to choose a facility and she would admit her. Mother and my siblings won't allow that. I insisted on home health care at least and her doctor did order it. I am unable to coordinate it, and have problems with the nurses aide, PT, OT, ST, and social worker (who has yet to call me, even though I asked to speak with her two weeks ago when mother started receiving services) asking mother to schedule her care, and also calling her to schedule care visits, and they were all informed to call me or my sister to schedule visits. Not one of them has called me or my sister once. I need help obviously but soon I feel I may be needing legal help if she continues to be neglected. My siblings don't see this. HELP.
If Medicaid is going to enter the picture, you should consult with an eldercare attorney about the retitling of the home.
If your mother has dementia, getting her to listen to " reason" is pretty useless. Combined with her very rigidly organized personality, getting her to " accept" anything other than living at home with you as her personal servant isn't going to happen.
Someone other than you is going to have to lay out " this is what is going to happen" and effect the change. She won't be happy, but you'll get your health back. Right now, your job is to make a plan for YOU.
And feel free to find another agency if they're not calling you back.
We have another poster here, Upset, who was living with her mom and being verbally sbused. Brother had PoA. She successfully walked away.
If someone else has poa, just leave. Call up poa sibling and tell them it is their turn now. They will figure out pretty quickly what mom's needs are.
If you have poa, this might be stickier. Come back with some of the legal details so we can give you better advice.
Do you live with mom ?
One thing to remember; if mom falls, has an injury, even a minor one, or gets so agitated that she is out of control, call 911 and have her sent to the ER for evaluation. You can refuse to pick her up and return her to her previous environment, as it clearly does not provide a high enough level of care.