She shows no interest in anything yet wants to go anytime I say we are going somewhere in the car. We go for short trips like to get ice cream or run business errand where she stays in locked car for a few minutes but that's not enough. She's seemed not interested in anything and I can't seem to think of anything. we could go away to the beach together but she would not be interested in going outside. she walks short distances with walker but otherwise it would be me pushing wheelchair. We grew up without much exposure to most hobbies because there was not much money and pre occupation with one another's drama. What a way to live? I am now retired and she is 85 and we do have a little money but can't think of anything to do that would interest mom. Does not like and can't follow movies. She has a hearing aid so restaurants and loud places are not a good selection and the local senior agency has been tried. When she can't hear, she is not a happy camper and will not do anything if I am not with her. Probably depression and to much dependence on me but can anyone give me advice. Was not accepted into day care because of incontinence and behaviors and has been in 3 facilities and had to leave those too. Could not or would not socialize.
I was just at a Teepa Snow conference, wonderful and frightening information all rolled into one. She said even doing something as simple as organizing poker chips, blue ones in this bag, red ones in that bag would be a positive. Or folding towels, or moving something from one side of the closet/pantry to the other side.
We, as caregivers, have to realize that our carees don't have to be doing something all the time. Their abilities have changed and we have to change with them, they can't change to us and what they used to be able to do they can't do anymore.
My mother sits in her chair watching tv all day. I think my goodness, really? But that is what is comfortable to her. When she seems restless I give her washcloths and hand towels to fold, I ask her if she could do me a favor as it would really help me out, and she beams with accomplishment after she is done. Experiment a little bit with little things like that and see what she likes if anything.
I also use YouTube as videos can just run from one into the other. Amazon sells these Fire Sticks that plug into the side of your tv and enables you to access all of the streaming apps.
CherylJane I will also say, for your own sanity, get a caregiver in there to give yourself a break. I know it is hard but you have to have a break for yourself. Even if you sell it to your mom by saying she is your house cleaner and she doesn't have to socialize with her it will give you a chance for some air.
Hang in there, you are doing a great job.