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I'm with you Lassie!
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sdnbishop...im sure it was extremely hard for you to watch you husband die...BUT...it's even harder for someone to keep living for longer lengths of time in that condition. i don't think anyone wants to live longer than necessary when the end comes. it's mercy from above that takes them sooner than later! said with lots of love...my mother is on her death bed now...and it's killing me too...i adore her...she was the best mother ever. hope god takes her soooooon! extreme dementia is taking her life.
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All good comments about how morphine can relieve her pain. Yet, I hear your concern and wonder if part of it is because she is not as aware as you might like her to be? Maybe I'm projecting my own experience ? When Mom was in hospital and in dying process she was in pain from multiple health problems. DR. gave her intravenous morphine (with my father's consent),and by the time I got there (I lived 1500 miles away), Mom was basically in a coma from the medication. She lived another 8 days, even after Dad, Dr. and I had made the difficult decision to withdraw food and water - My 90 yr old Dad left this decision to me and I asked the Dr. and he recommended it. Anyway, I never got to say goodbye to my Mom or hear from her as she was really out of it in morphine. This may not be your situation at all. But just make sure you consult with Dr. and family and get all the information you can about her situation. So that you can make a clear decision and not regret it like I regret my situation (i.e. Why I never asked the DR. why he had my Mom on such a high dose of morphine).
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I regret to say that the CDC has now recommended doctors cut way back on prescribing painkillers. The CDC has recommended doctors prescribe OTC ibuprofen, exercise, etc. before prescribing painkillers. The CDC thinks doctors hand out painkillers, are getting the entire nation addicted, and then when cut off for being 'drug seekers', the people are forced to go out and buy cheaper heroin....This is all very well, they have a point, and the unfortunate junkies won't care because, heroin. I fear when our loved ones (and ourselves someday), are in terrible pain, we can expect to be told to take aspirin, practice deep breathing, and go to our mental 'happy place'. Isn't that a lovely prospect?
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Lassie: You're right on point. Heroin is coming across the borders in major quantities. We need the elected President to make this his #1 priority!
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To "Llama lover47", the survey was sent from the hospice's headquarters out of state, not directly from the hospice we used. As for my phone #, the survey had a place to put it if I chose, besides, why wouldn't I want my phone # to be given to the headquarters? My hope was that the headquarters would forward my complaints to this local hospice, and somebody would contact me about coming in for a discussion.
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My FIL was in the hospital with one of MANY stays with his chronic lymphocytic leukemia. He got bad one night, the family was called and we were told he wouldn't make the night. Well, he rallied, ate some soup, chatted with us all and we thought "OK, he's going to shake this again--amazing" and went home. 6;30 am the next day we got the call he was comatose, Ran back to the hospital and his doc was there, dad was totally unresponsive. Doc told us he would not possibly come back from this, his lung were filling with fluid faster than they could drain them, his red blood count was negligible and there was no way he was making it out of this. The doc asked if he could give him some morphine to ease his breathing (it was so horrible to hear that painful rasping for each breath) His kids agreed. The nurses had gotten dad all cleaned up, and the dr went to the IV line and put the biggest syringe of morphine in dad's IV. He did it with his back turned, so my hubby and his sis didn't see, but I did. He left us and said he'd hang around the hospital until the end. My hubs said "But that could take all day"--15 minutes later, at the most, I quietly said to my hubby "honey, your dad is gone". Dad went peacefully and calmly, not fighting for each breath.
I THANKED that gracious dr and he said "I just gave him comfort", Did he OD dad on morphine? I couldn't swear to it, but it is highly unusual for drs to administer actual pain relievers.

This kind of thing happens all the time. I was aware of the drs intent and I kept my mouth shut. Dad had suffered enough. His dr was an oncologist and he eventually loses all his patients. I think trust in your dr is paramount.
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