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It's a good idea to explain what you're feeling to your doctor. That's the smart thing to do. Maybe, the doctor can prescribe you a med and/or recommend some counseling. It's a huge deal to have your mom with that condition.

Still, someone with your mom's condition requires a lot of around the clock work. It's not something one person can do alone in the home. You know that she's getting the care she needs where she is. She obviously isn't thinking it through, because if she were, she would understand that her plan isn't feasible.

Is she able to comprehend that there are no funds for inhouse care and that you aren't able to quit your job and care for her? If your mom doesn't have dementia and is able to reason, then I might explain why her wishes can't be met and that her continued pleas are stressful to you. Tell her that the visits should be pleasant and that you can't discuss her coming home each time you talk. Maybe, reality will settle in with her.

If she has dementia, then it doesn't matter how you explain it, because she will forget what you say and you'll just have to redirect the conversation each time she brings it up. That makes it tough, but you just have to prepare yourself and hope she eventually lets the topic go.

I used to have anxiety attacks and they are very scary. The good news is that once mine were diagnosed and treated, they went away. Just knowing a lot about them took the scare out if it for me. I did take meds for a short time.

Please know that there are many places you can go for support and to talk to other people with similar situations. That always makes me feel better.
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In the midst of a panic attack I find square breathing helpful... in to the count of 4, hold 4, exhale 4, hold 4 (or 5 or 6). Concentrate on counting and breathing.

To forestall the panic in the first place find a way to keep you mind occupied, immerse yourself in a book or movie, window shop at the mall, go out for hot chocolate with friends or just people watch.

Get some exercise, preferably outside, even if it is just walking around the block.

Avoid caffeine and alcohol.
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Hangingon, first of all, a big hug to you. You sound like a thoughtful, caring daughter who is doing her best. And in the end, the best is all we can do.

Yes, see your doctor. You may need antidepressant meds, because your emotional system is under stress and out of whack. You maybe referred to a psychiatrist or mental health counselor....if you are, please go. Support in times of stress is critical.

Second, is there a geriatric psychiatrist or Psych nurse practitioner at mom's facility? It sounds as though MOM needs some attention in that area. Talk with mom's nurse , the social worker and the Dr who treats her at the facility.

Come back and let us know how you're doing, please!
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