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What is the best disposal diapers for incontinence? Should you go in between sizes, s/m or l/xtra l? A tight fit or loose better? Pull up or tabs? I am now using the Depends Flex Fit brand, a tight fit, they are pull ups. The #2 is leaking out, soiling sweats like crazy, nights the worse. Is there a better brand? Should I double the depends at night? Hard to get this done if he is not wet or soiled. Is the side tabs better for the big, messy jobs? I will change over if needed, the day care uses them and they seem to hold even #1 better. I am concerned I will have a difficult time diapering him though. All of your support appreciated. God Bless

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Check out Northshore supply. They are the BEST. Will send samples & you can actually talk to a person who knows what they're talking about. I ended up ordering exclusively from them for my father.
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I just heard about these underwear for incontinence, but I haven't tried them yet.
https://www.iconundies.com/
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My mom couldn't fit into Depends size small. She tried CVS and Kmart brands as well. She uses the SM ones from Sam's Club that works well and for the price because you get bulk it's worth it!
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Bedside commode most helpful.
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We had the same problem here. Nights were the Worst, especially for urinary incontinence. Single or doubled up pull-ups weren't containing well at all. During the day fecal incontinence had become equally unmanageable. Until I found the Abena's AbriSan Preimium Liners. They are like the Tena pads only much better. They are large inserts that fit inside the brief. (People with ulcerative colitis use these pads.) Be sure they are concave to provide the best protection against seeping and against skin irritation of the inner thighs. These pads are super absorbent and wick the moisture away from the skin. Often the brief beneath is still intact and only the insert needs to be replaced. They have been a Godsend for us! I found them online at Amazon dot com, and would buy them from the most economical distributor. Try a pack. I would then typically order 4 packs at a time, delivered to the home in a large box. Such a relief for both of us and sanity saver for me!
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My mother liked and used Poise.
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Thank you, Old Red Wolf, for your explanation. We've been experimenting for a few years now. Because hubby is on a diuretic, it makes things just that much more difficult to predict. You are correct when you write about the skin deterioration. Hubby has this. I'm glad to say that since his hospitalization, the nursing staff has managed to clear a lot of it up, but it will have to be continued once he gets home. I am hopeful that his rehabilitation will allow us to at least get out once a week or so, and that's when your suggestions for different combinations will come in very handy for us. Thank you again for all your excellent suggestions!
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My Mom has been using pull ups. I like the Walgreen brand. I ask he aids, now Mom in incontinent , if they want me to go to the diapers to make it easier. They told me the sides rip open for getting off easier. (Wish I knew this before)
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Hugemom, not all incontinence products have the same absorbency even in the same category of product. Many do, but others put low cost or thin size or other features first, and make a much less absorbent product. So if someone is new to handling an incontinence problem or if their problem has gotten substantially worse, you do not want to discourage them from experimenting and asking questions until they find something that works completely for them, even if it takes a combination of several products to do the job. For example, on some long hectic days I might use a Tena comfort pant on the outside of an Abena Abri-Flex L3 Pull-Up over 2 Tranquility Contour Booster Pads. The Tena comfort pant is a super stretchy pant that holds the Abena pull-up close to my body to prevent leaks around the leg openings when the pull-ups and booster pads are full and heavy, because I am almost small enough to go from the large to the medium size on the pull-up. The booster pads allow flow through from the inner booster pad to the booster pad underneath and then flow further through to the pull-up as each successive layer gets full. This will hold several full emptying of my bladder, if I will be someplace where there is inadequate bathroom access for a person with my other disabilities. I could replace the two Tranquility Contour Booster Pads with one Tranquility Contour Super Plus (Bariatric) Booster Pad, which would just fit within the length and width of the absorbent section of the Abena pull-up in the large size, if I felt like it. With less total absorbency, I might not make it through a long day staying dry when even the local version of handicapped restrooms is not accessible to me. For most people with incontinence problems, they could probably not imagine needing that much protection in their worst nightmares - I never gave it a thought until it happened in one brief accident, and I had recovered considerably and needed less protection, to my relief, when I had another accident and suddenly needed that much protection again. Some "overnight" pull-ups and briefs are considerably less absorbent than my Abena pull-ups. Some booster pads are considerably less absorbent than the Tranquility Contour booster pads. Keep encouraging everyone to keep trying until everybody stays dry, because the alternative can be skin breakdown, infection, hospitalization, and sometimes death. That is the grime side. The happy side is that there are combinations that work for some very tough cases.
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Hugemom, Tranquility has some good bariatric diapers, pads, and booster pads that might be good for your husband. Do not be put off because Tranquility's absorbency numbers seem much lower than some other brands for similar items, because Tranquility measures the absorbency of a diaper while it is under the pressure that it would be under when someone sits or lies on it, which is after all what we do with our incontinence underwear. So the Tranquility products really are very close in absorbency to the Abena products, i.e. they are also a premium brand. Abena may also have a bariatric set of products, I think I remember some but I am not sure.
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As usual, the others all give wonderful advice. My husband is incontinent (both ways). He is also a large man. I buy Prevail Bariatric diapers. All adult diapers have pretty much the same absorbency. I've found my husband needs changed about every 4-5 hours. As he is currently in rehab for physical therapy, his nurse has told me that the "pull-up" style of adult diapers was contributing to his skin issues as the elastic legs and waist were digging into his skin. She suggested the true diaper style with velcro closures on the sides. We are on Amazon's Subscribe and Save only because they are the only ones who carry adult diapers in his size.
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The Abena products are by far superior. You can use a diaper with an Abri-San Liner pad inside. It is a little thick but you can then remove the liner only and the pull up should still be good at night
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I use Prevail PF-512 PerFit Pull-on Brief - Medium - 80/Case for Mom and order them through Jet.com. If you purchase more than one the price drops to $31.72 a case.
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cwillie, I thought the same thing but they are quite small and fully adjustible so don't turn man's best friend purple
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Penile clamps?? I had to look that up Veronica, it sounds like some kind of medieval torture device LOL. Wow, you really do learn something new every day!I'm taking care of my mom not a man, but that would have been so helpful for my dad when he was having prostate problems,
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Has anyone thought of using a penile clamp? My husband has been incontinent of urine for several years following a prostatectomy. he manages all this himself and for him being mobile the pull ups work well. I found the clamps on Amazon (not cheap) but he finds them pretty comfortable and they do stop a lot of leakage. He can still hold the urine and goes to bathroom normally but some days he is wetter than others or simple can't find a bathroom in time
The clamps are just a hinged piece of plastic lined with foam that clip together.
Naturally you need a co-operative loved one to use a clamp as they are easy to remove. He does wear a pull up as well as they occasionally slip off.
Texas catheters do work for some but are generally not well received and if you manage to get them on snugly are easy to pull off. As always with any incontinence issue cleanliness is of vital importance.
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Grandma1954, thank you for the information on the Lavin Lift Straps, I will need them soon. Now I use a Best Toileting Sling to move my husband from the bed to the shower chair with a Hoyer Lift, but soon his back will be too weak for sitting up.
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My husband became incontinent in 2013. I tried every product and got tired of cleaning up leaks. What I've found works best for heavy duty are Abena products. Abena Abri-form Premium level 4 (S,M,L) with tabs are great for overnight. Abriform Air flex Plus Extra pull ups are good for heavy duty daytime. Both of the products have an inner leg cuff to prevent leaks. For lighter duty, McKesson Underwear Ultra pull ups, level 3, also has inner leg cuffs and is reasonably priced, about $32 for 80.
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I've found Tranquility to be the best for our purposes. I, too, use Amazon to buy my supplies because the delivery saves me a trip. There also are pants designed for #2. If you have access to the Internet look up the various sites under incontinence. Most of the providers also sell the protective pants for #2.
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That device sounds like something for the person over on the thread "How do you put an adult diaper on someone who cannot stand or roll over?" G1954, would you mind repeating it there?
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I found a pad to put on the bed that worked wonders. Absorbs like nothing else I ever tried. Found it through Costco website it is a product by Conni they make bed pads as well as underwear. The bed pas absorbs about 80 fluid ounces. A bit on the pricey side but I wish I had found them years ago.
As for wet there were times when my husband just never seemed wet but as soon as I changed his position we would get a flood. So I started reclining him more often just to change position to allow the bladder to empty more often. Later we were able to use a condom catheter and that worked wonders!!! Prior to that he would have pulled it off.
As to the question if the pull ups are better than the tab type..it depends (no pun intended) if the person is walking and has the stability to stand. If they are not walking or can not stand the pull up type is not great as they are difficult to get in place. The tab type can easily be put on in a prone or upright position. When my husband was able to stand I also added a pair of briefs along with the tab or pull up as the brief held the absorbent garment closer to the body so I had fewer leaks.
I think with each person it is a trial and error thing until you find the one that works.
For a person that is bed bound there is a "device" that I found that worked pretty well for me, for a while. Lavin Lift Straps but they must be used with a Hoyer Lift. The straps are placed on the leg, attached to the Hoyer and then the hoyer raised. This lifts the lower half of the body so you can do a change without rolling the person back and forth. There is a Youtube video on how it works.
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For mom, who is a heavy wetter at night, she wears NorthShore AirSupreme Briefs (like a diaper with tabs). They are quite large and very absorbent. Also the washable soft waterproof pads under her just in case.
For daytime-Tranquility Premium Overnight Incontinence Underwear (pullups), with a Tranquility Topliner Superbooster Pad (no plastic backing as mentioned above).
I purchase all on Amazon, which is great for the delivery, pricing, and REVIEWS.
I also like that at tax time I can add up all my past purchases from Amazon at the "your orders" section- these products are deductible.
Best wishes!
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Ohhhhh. I shall buy Tena next shopping.
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The pad in Depends is something that a lot of people swear by, but in my experience it does not work unless you first slit through the waterproof backing and add it as a booster pad.
And Depends and Always may be the nicest, most underwear-like pull ups but there are products that are far more absorbent. The same goes for pads, Poise has nothing that comes close to Tena Overnight pads (which I do use as boosters).
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Depends with a poise pad shoved in to absorb extra urine. Urine might be thinning out the mix for your situation. Dunno. I order in BULK monthly. Not sure if the pad would work with umm his junk being there. But it saves me a lot of cleanup with grandma.
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I think it really depends on each individual and their needs and preferences.
In my experience all of them are designed to absorb urine and will not absorb even very loose feces, hence the overflow. An overly large tab style diaper worked the best for us in keeping everything contained simply because they are bigger and cover more. When I tried a tighter fit around the legs it led to some horrible chafing and skin irritation there, in my mind it was better to have leaks than that!
Does he get out of bed at all for clean up? I've toyed with the idea of putting snug fit boxers over the top to help contain everything until we get to the bathroom.
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I noticed the on-line supply houses will send samples to new clients. It is best to try each one out to see what works best.

Example, I was using regular Depends for my Dad, then I tried the more expensive model and that worked even better. Then Dad's Aide said he needs a larger size, so I did that, and finally we had a winner. It's all trial and error.
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