Follow
Share

She lives in an assisted living facility. Does he have to give me permission to visit her or to take her out for the day to go shopping?

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
This a comment not answer. I really hope you guys work this out.I mean that from the bottom of my heart. Even though i do not know you. This needs to be handled with careful thought and logic but also with your heart to who ever the poa is. I do not know the circumstances although its si hurtful not to be able ti see a loved one. This happened to my friend her father was not able to speak n sound mind and she couldn't see him. I am so very sorry millennia 😞
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

The son that had POA of our 87 year old, we were the long term caregiver's was on a complete power trip, when she was in AL. Now that he has to ask for permission from the guardian, he can't.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Millenia, all that is set up on day one. Visit when you don't interrupt her meals.
If you take her out all day, she might miss medications, so try to avoid that. Realize she won't have all-day energy for shopping. She may even tell you she wants to move in with you. Ignore that request, it will be the worst decision you ever make. Watch "Rain Man" start to finish and you will see what I mean.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

By the way, I didn't mean to say that the POA can just wake up in the morning and say something like, "Gee, I think today I'm going to prevent my sibling from visiting Mom just because I think I don't like my sibling, any more," and get away with it. I merely meant that the POA usually has quite a lot of latitude if there seems to be any kind of cause for it.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

That answer is only if the brother is the sponsor at the assisted living facility, normally there is not a sponsor for assisted living it just someone helped to get them there and left them with that staff to determine when they can leave and manage their doctor trips & other curriculum as it comes up like church outings on picnics, movie trips, shopping trips, or just a tour somewhere all to break boredom. Permission to visit only occurs at a nursing home where a brother or other person(s) give specific details on when visitation can occur and who may come and go at specific times if need be, and a list of names is kept on file of those allowed, some can stay all day if given that privilege. However, the staff at a nursing home can limit visiting rights based on medical appointments, eating procedures, and rehabilitation arrangements with their personnel. You have a answer from me as NO assisted living cannot except for limitation during the night when residents are to be in bed, curfews exist when no one can visit.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Here's the true legal answer - it depends.

So, it probalby depends on the POA form's wording, which is different in each state. An individual's rights vary from state-to-state. Each care facility probably has its own rules.

If you're asking because you wonder if you should call him and ask him to give you permission and not certain about it, go ahead and call to see if he knows the answer. If you're asking because he's said specifically that you can't then I think you'll have to go to a lawyer if you want this changed. However, as I think others said, the POA gets the most benefit from the law and from care facilities, in most states and situations.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

The OP gives no indication that the loved on in question suffers from mental impairment.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

No. POA gives the person assigned the right to make legal decisions on behalf of the assigner. It does not give them any power to micromanage their life.

There may be other factors that lie outside the provisions of a POA. Discuss these with the facility director and, if necessary, with a solicitor [lawyer].||

Good luck.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

In most cases, the AL will assume that close family members are 'allowed' to take a resident out. However, if the staff have doubts about someone – a noticeably alcohol-impaired son turning up to take mom out to dinner, for example (it happens), they will step in. Or, as some have mentioned, if the POA has provided a list of who can and can't take Mom out, they will certainly honor it.

So, usually permission doesn't have to be given for close family, but it can be taken away. Except in cases of an immediate safety concern (like a drunk son or Mom's health status at the time the outing is planned), the permission is in the hands of the POA as the person who officially speaks for the family whenever there's a disagreement.

Also, the level of your mother's impairment plays into this. The AL will be more protective of a resident who is completely unable to make decisions than they are of someone who's still able to express their own wishes.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

If your mother is able to say she wants visitors, then she can have visitors as is her right living in a facility. If for some reason a visitor upsets her every time they visit then it may be better for that person to visit with another or not visit at all. If she is totally unable to state she wants visitors, then the POA could have a say regarding visitors. It may be a simple case, like stated above, you need to be put on the visitors log. You can always speak to your local ombudsman and he/she can give a more detailed answer depending on your mothers condition, POA;s and resident rights.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

This is not unreasonable although it may seem so. Since she is mentally impaired she cannot choose for herself. It's not your brother who made the rules, it's the institution. Just ask to be put on the visitor list. Sometimes families have "friends" or relatives who are toxic or irresponsible so its for good reason.This is a blanket rule and is not personal.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

People/Institutions tend to listen to the person who has POA - because it's more legal than one who does not. I've read over and over on this site, that a non-caregiving sibling who has POA have forbidden other family family from visiting or even discussing the parent with anyone. All I can say is - play nice with your brother so that he doesn't have to "flex" his POA muscle.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Yes in can!!!! Im him and sometimes it has to bevdone if its effecting the lovrd one thats there. Its hard but hopefullly she picked the correct prrson and not someone who hoes on powervtrips
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I had my Mom in a memory care assisted living facility. Upon signing her in (as POA) I completed forms stating if there was anyone that should not be allowed to visit. I also had to indicate who could take her out. If someone wanted to take her out that wasn't on my list, they said they would call me for permission. In her 18 month stay, I was the only one who ever took her out. BUT I know some families have issues and I suspect that is the reasoning behind these rules/forms.
Helpful Answer (4)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter