Just had to cash in ins to pay funeral exp and still 2k over. I have been primary caregiver for 13 years and since 2011 have been POA and responsible for all shopping, bill payments, home repairs, doctor appointments etc. She has been hospitalized for 4 surgeries since Sep 2011.Her cash is almost gone and I just cashed in an insurance policy to pre-pay funeral expenses.We have kept her in her home the last 15 months with the help of my son and hospice. She has qualified for Extra Help/ low Income Subsidy for Medication and now trying to qualify for Medicare Qualified Medicare Beneficial (QMB). Cash assets must be less than $7160. Can I back pay myself for $2000 for care giving, home maintenance travel expense etc. I probably should have been doing this on a monthly basis, but I have been trying to stretch her cash and income over the last 13 years.
hoosier: Hospice is fully covered by regular Medicare, including meds.
Other things to spend down the money on include Mom's wardrobe, shoes, long-term magazine subscriptions, a better wheelchair, a nice recliner (maybe with a lift feature) any furnishings (will she be staying at home or moving to a care center?) things like nice fitted sheets for a hospital bed (if she needs a hospital bed). Some of these things would not be appropriate if she is on hospice.
The easiest thing is just to use that "extra" money to pay for whatever is not covered now, knowing that it will be covered soon.
I know that you did what you hoped would be the best thing for your mother. No criticism from me! But to newer caregivers here, I think this is a good object lesson. Not having your parent pay his or her own way as you go along is really seldom the best for everyone.
Pay for Mom's things with Mom's money. Let Dad reimburse you for mileage if you must travel for him. Have a written personal care agreement and/or room and board arrangements. Document all of this so that Medicaid (and other relatives) will not consider it a gift.
I will you well, hoosier1.