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I work as a community manager in a senior home. My agency and the housing building pushed this 92 year old woman off on me. She had past history of accusations etc. However she had grown over the 2 years attached to me. I took her shopping, helped her move and so much more. I care about her a lot. She has no family or friends left. Anyways, she opened two credit cards with me listed as an authorized user with the ok to use if I paid back. I hesitated but she ensure it was fine. I made a few purchases for personal reasons but most was for her. Now my company stepped in because I moved her without telling them and I was told I had to let her know I could no longer visit her. The next two days I got a phone call saying she accused me of using her cards without permission. My heart sank because I have no proof. I have small children and would never do that. I made the first payments on due date and will pay it faithfully.. what do I do now? I never told my company. The max spent between her and I were 2,000 bucks. Will o go to jail? I'm so scared.

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you need a lawyer who can solve your problem.
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I'm sorry, but if that woman had opened 50 credit cards I wouldn't have wanted my name on them. Every red flag in my mind would have been on high alert. I'm only saying this to advise anyone else ever in this same situation. Don't ever in this life have someone elderly put your name on anything. As you've found out, it's a recipe for disaster. Best to talk to a lawyer first about the legalities so it doesn't look shady...because it really does. Even if it isn't.
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Misunderstood, you are a professional in a position of trust. You knew the rules. Heavens! - you were employed specifically to keep those rules! You went ahead anyway. I just don't know what to say.

Frustrated, Misunderstood accepted a salary, large or small makes no difference, for her role of protecting her client. If she's that ignorant of basics such as not using her client's accounts for her own personal spending, she has no business being in the job. Seriously now. Anyway, she did know, that's why she was so hesitant about doing it - until expediency got the better of her conscience. She should have listened to herself.

So now what? I think, as usual, Pam Stegman got it right. Get advice, and jump before you're pushed. If no harm has come to your client, and you can get out of this situation without lasting damage done to your record, then good luck to you. I'm happy to believe you've been only foolish but in that case for heaven's sake learn from it.
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Pamstegman if there are predators that don't realize they are predators taking advantage of our seniors then they don't belong working with seniors. If their insight is so shallow as not to know right from wrong they don't need to be in a position of making decisions for seniors. Not meaning to do something is no excuse for not being held responsible for doing it. Perhaps this is a chance for "misunderstood" to understand let us not be the ones to keep her from growing and learning.
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Another thought. Much has been made of the word 'manager' here, assuming this woman had a great job and probably made a good income. Therefore it is also assumed she has experience, education and the background to 'know better'. MANY people involved in healthcare of the elderly are uneducated, barely experienced and while they may have a 'title' do not have the where with all to know what is expected of them. I was appalled when my mother in law was still alive, in a long term care facility in a very small town, what was called a 'nurse'. Clearly, not an RN or even an LPN. It is a huge problem, at both ends of the spectrum of life (babies and elderly), being 'stuck' with the least competent and experienced/educated caregivers. I make no assumptions about what someone 'ought' to know if they are a 'manager'. Are any of you familiar with what the going wage is in LTC facilities? What social workers make? What day care people make? These are not 'professionals' often who have even been well trained. It often appalls me what to me is common sense is no where close to that with some folks, but that doesn't make them criminals. Maybe she is, maybe not, but her title doesn't indicate what she 'ought' to know or do.
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Sorry, meant OFF her credit cards.
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I think the original question before so many comments was 'could she be convicted of fraud' and it seems obvious that yes, she 'could'. There is a ton of judgement here and perhaps that is correct. Perhaps it's not. Rather than making assumptions about what this person's intent was - since we do not know each other - how about either answering her question if you know the answer or suggesting something helpful, such as, 'pay the debt asap and get your name of her credit cards'. I suggested that as well pamstegman. If you are ON a credit card, you probably can CLOSE it as well. Maybe not, but if the balance due is what you owe her, pay and close it. Or write her a check and communicate to her in writing that you no longer wish to have any liability having to do with her credit, or ACCESS to it. Apologize to her. Get on with it. Talk to a lawyer but most importantly, do the right thing. According to what this person said, she is a mother of a young child. If she made an error in judgement, if she is just stupid or if she is truly devious, she still has to set it right and do the right thing. A child is involved here, both a person to whom she owes support to and an example of living to. Life and decisions all have consequences. This person will have to face hers. In the end, the legal system will be more impressed with paying back the money and setting things right than anything else. Plus, if this really was a mistake then learn from it and go on down the road.
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pinky, predators often don't know they are predators. They think they are trying to help. A certain rock star said he loved children. Never had a clue that he crossed the line. When the man says back off and you don't, you need a shrink to sort it out.
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I'm not sure why so many responders are giving tips on how to avoid being convicted so you wont lose your job and not be allowed to work with seniors or in the health field again..........you absolutely don't need to be working with seniors or anyone else you can take advantage of.
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misunderstood, you have heard a lot of angry comments here. These are very similar to what you are going to heard from a Judge. So yes you pay this off in full before you see that judge to lessen his anger. If you don't, the judge will come down hard on you, the judge will convict and sentence. Then you will lose your job because you will have a criminal record. Don't let this happen.
Stay away and do not contact the old lady. That is another way to avoid the wrath of the Judge. You made mistakes. Pay it back tomorrow. I can't tell you how important that is!!!!
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Wow. ... I wish you knew me and the client. .. but I respect your opinion. Thank you
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I cannot wrap my head around that you are a manager of any type an would engage such egregious activities. I do not believe that your agency or housing building "pushed" her off on you. For problem clients, you have a responsibility as a manager to problem solve and manage the client in collaboration with community resources/agencies to accommodate and help this client. If this is in your job description, then you are expected to do this, if it isn't, then you advocate for the client and involve the people who do have this job description. The words I have for you are so harsh I won't put them in print here. You took advantage of this person no matter how you try to rationalize it. You took her money. You hid it. You KNEW she was vulnerable and you went for it; plain and simple. This is textbook fraud. You disgust me. Too bad this person isn't my client; I would love the chance to be a part of seeing this through to your prosecution. I hope you end up on your local news. I hope you end up in front of a judge who will make an example of you.
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Best way to do is just paid off whatever balance you owed ASAP!! And off your name from your friend's cards!
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I'm sorry for typos. .typing from a small phone.. I am missing information as I am very upset.I work as a manager yes.... This woman became like the grandmother I never had. I did everything for her and out of my own pocket. Scamming or taking advantage of her is something I'd never do.. I moved her because the last 6 years she was bullied by ten area in her tiny housing apartment. She wanted to end her life. I reached out for help everywhere. People pushed her away. I'd do anything for her. What she allowed me to use the card for was to get my car out of the shop. I was in a tight spot. I didn't want to use it bc of being judged... I was honest and told my company. I also paid 350 off out of the 776 I owed. That was the first payment and even before it was due. I feel horrible. . But I was her next of kin and her helper.. she trusted me and I did her.. she helped me when I needed it just like I did...
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I would like to tell my story after read from this poster(misunderstood)...... I had a very good friend!! I assumed this woman(Maria), I thought she is my good friend from our mutual girlfriend(RN) who she is very well to do and owning four different care home for elderly( each home has 6 residents) in San Diego. Each holiday season she will invite me to her place I had assumed she is making pretty good income because her house is like a castle! Herself and all caregivers work for her get well pays... I got call from her said she want to speak to Japanese to one of her client to find out where about her dead husband WILL.... I told Maria that it is not your business to know where is!! then about 3 or 4 month later Maria was all over our San Diego news paper for charged of embezzlement from the two of male resident that she stole from him over a half million... if you are interesting to read:
utsandiego/news/2010/dec/15/operator-care-facilities-charged-embezzlement/
send some money to Philippine... She was set in jail for about a year and currently she couldn't have this type of business while she is alive.. If you are the care home licencee or administrator to facility shouldn't became resident's poa or credit card authorized user! (State of Ca is prohibited) . Very careful hired CG'S, only I could say is NOT TO INVOLVED MONEY and you are only hired to be take care of PERSONS NOT THE MONEY!!
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Sounds like you took advantage of a lonely 92-yr old lady who has no family, pretending to be her friend. And now you're practicing your story in this forum. Even if it all started our innocently enough, it morphed into something you know deep down was wrong. Thankfully, you were caught before any more damage was done.
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Sometimes things start out innocently but morph into something totally different. I make it a rule if I am assisting a client with spending money-receipts are always requested as back up. Anytime you are dealing with an elderly person or a disabled person, the request from her that you use the card was probably innocent enough, however if she has any deficit in cognitive functioning she may say things as she did. It is never a good policy to accept 'benefits' or gifts of value from any client. Each circumstance is different. Your actions could be viewed as financial exploitation which is a crime. It doesn't matter if you innocent or not, at the very least you were naïve regarding this type of personal interaction. I would consult with an attorney. Good faith would be paying off your personal purchases. When everything ends, you will have at least learned a valuable lesson. Assisting the vulnerable adult can be tricky at times but rewarding. Working with vulnerable adults, you need to protect yourself, keep notes, receipts etc. and keep a professional distance while showing you care about this person. It is never acceptable to spend someone else's money for yourself. Good luck
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I don't understand how as a "community MANAGER" of a community home, you did not understand that what you were doing was wrong. It was ethically and morally wrong. I have a lot of questions that your post does not really seem to answer.

I cannot put my name as a user on my husband's credit card without his consent. To do that, he has to request it and then give them my Social Security number. IF as you say, she opened 2 cards with you listed as an authorized user, she had to ask you for information. That was your first mistake. WHY would she suggest such a thing? WHY would you accept? You had to know that was not ok. And then to use it if you paid it back? Wrong, wrong, wrong! You could and should have said NO thank you. It does not seem like you hesitated at all.

IF what you say is true, then you have very poor judgement and from the way you write, it seems like English may be your second language. Maybe...you did not completely understand the situation, but it does not excuse what you did.

Another thing that bothers me is you "made a few purchases for personal reasons". $2000.00 is a lot of "personal reasons" purchases especially when using someone else's money.

You say you moved her without telling anyone. Moved her where from where? What right did you have to move her at all? I don't think that would be in your job description.

The whole thing smells fishy and your justification of how things happened and blaming the 92 year old woman just seems unacceptable.

I was in banking for several years and saw financial abuse of elders and even reported some. I was not usually wrong. I agree with many of the above, you need a lawyer. You should definitely make restitution ASAP with money you obtained legally. I also do not think you should be working in a field where you have access to anyone's personal information.

I don't mean to sound harsh, but when you do something that is wrong, there are consequences. Hopefully for the sake of your children they will not be too harsh and that you will have learned a valuable lesson.
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No need to worry you'll get just what's coming to you..........and the part about you have young children what does that have to do with anything, you're not above the law because you give birth
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In order for you to be authorized on the accounts, didn't the woman have to contact her credit card companies? I know that was needed for me to get on Mom's MasterCard. So there's your proof.
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You are naïve my dear. For years my mother has told me to "Go get yourself something nice for your birthday, Christmas. anniversary" etc. I would tell her OK, thank you but thinking NO WAY, NO HOW, NOT TRICKING ME!
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Third and final thought on this. It is also possible that when you were required to cut off contact with her she became fearful that she would not be repaid. Not only would I got to her and fix it, I would also go to my employer and tell THEM the truth (if that's what you are stating) and let them know it was perhaps bad judgement or wrong and you most assuredly want to make arrangements to pay her back, as you always intended to do. Again, communication with all concerned parties is the key at this point in order to keep lawyers and a police action out of it, unless of course it's already at this point.
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BTW, you didn't say who you got the call from. If it was someone who heard it through a rumor grapevine that's different than a knock on the door from the police. You could call her, deeply and sincerely apologize for your actions, make sure you pay her back with a check and make sure you have her sign something agreeing that she is paid in full so you have a record of it and again, get your name off anything hers is on. You do not say if you have ever engaged in such actions or behavior before. A pattern of this would be very bad. It IS possible that she told someone about this arrangement and they pumped her head full of accusations and doubt. I don't have a fix on this situation and only you know here if you are positioning this on this site or if you are telling the truth. If no legal action has been taken, talking to her while crawling on your belly abjectly saying you are sorry might be the thing to do immediately. People often ramp things up because they cannot take accountability for their actions or because they don't go directly to the person they have a misunderstanding with. Perhaps in your desperation (you say you have two small kids and money I am sure is tight) you allowed yourself to 'walk the line'. My advice again is DO THE RIGHT THING RIGHT NOW. That could save you a lot of trouble down the line.
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You definitely need a lawyer. My guess is that no body is going to spend a lot of time on this. If you basically have no money and she signed up for this, I think you would probably be required to pay it back plus court costs and attorney fees. If I were you, TODAY I would do whatever I needed to do to a) speak with an attorney b) borrow from a family member or anybody who will lend you the money, including taking out a loan that you would have to pay interest on to PAY HER BACK. I would also - if you are a co owner on this card - call the credit card company and close the card. Your intention to set things straight at this point are about all you have going in your favor. You screwed up and you need to make it right asap. Which doesn't mean you won't get into some legal trouble. But realistically, you cannot get blood from an anemic turnip as they say. Perhaps the only way to keep your record clean and stay out of court is to negotiate with her, via a lawyer, to make things right, in order for her not ro prosecute.
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Why 2 credit cards and not just one? Why the need for any credit card? Why did you need to use them for your personal use? Do you not have your own money? As a community manager working through an agency, you know there are rules and regulations as to what you can and cannot do. You knowingly violated those rules and now will have to pay the consequences of your actions. You are not a victim. Do the right thing by paying off the credit cards and have nothing to do with that elderly lady. Hopefully you will only be charged with a misdemeanor and pay restitution.
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I have to agree with Eyrishlass--If you knew this woman had a "past history of accusations", why did you get into a situation that would make you vulnerable? If she's done this before, what's to prevent her from doing it again? Maybe she gets her kicks out of setting people up for this, and then accusing them. I say all this assuming you are innocent of any (intentional) wrongdoing.
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I have to wonder why you would become financially involved with a woman who, in the past, has made accusations about other people?

I don't know if you should be on the Ten Most Wanted List but it doesn't sound like you exercised good judgement. A 90-something woman has no business opening up lines of credit and being in the business that you're in you should have known better than to shackle yourself financially to an elderly person who isn't family. At the very best you were unprofessional, at the very worst, a criminal.
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First, you NEVER accept anything from a client. Second, if you cannot prove she authorized you to use her card, you can be prosecuted. You say you DID use the card for your personal use, so you are in trouble. You need an attorney. I wouldn't be surprised if the agency fired you. Do not do this ever again!
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I don't believe you. And neither will the district attorney's office. You should be scared. If you are questioned by the police or an assistant district attorney, invoke your right to an attorney. If you can't afford one, you'll get a public defender. Listen to him.

YOU are what everyone is afraid of -- a thief who, in her own mind, rationalizes that she intends to do the right thing and instead? Does everything wrong. You knew you crossed the line and, even here, anonymous, you cannot tell the truth.

Tell your attorney the truth. Hopefully, HOPEFULLY, he can get the charges dropped to misdemeanor status rather than a felony so you don't have a felony police record for the rest of your life. If you're charged with a felony, you're out of the care giving business. Probably are anyway.

Your best hope is to pray that the DA's office doesn't want to make an example out of you and over-charge you. I doubt you'll go to jail.

Borrow from family and friends and pay the credit card company back for ANY charges for which YOU don't have receipts to prove they were purchases made for your client -- as soon as possible.

You aren't the first person to do this to an elderly client. Make up your mind and accept that you made a terrible mistake. Try to make restitution. In the future, listen to your conscience. You knew what you were doing was wrong. You didn't care. You care now, why? Because you got caught.
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You are not in a good position PERIOD! Whether she allowed you to use the credit cards or not! First two things get a lawyer and give him the money to see it is given back to her.....quit your job before you are fired....which will happen no doubt, and have no more contact with this woman! I hope what you say happened is the truth and if it is you should be fine when you face the judge.....as long as you have no prior record that is! Best of luck because if it happened the way you said I do feel badly for you!
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