My brother keeps on telling Mom to call her Grandson. I have been caring for my Mom for the last few years. She just moved in with me 6 months ago because of Dementia. She can not understand or form sentences, she can barely walk on her own or get up out of her chair. She can not pick out clothes or dress herself. Incontinent and I must help her in the bathroom. My brother is constantly asking Mom to call his Son her Grandson and now my brother wants her to give him a few thousand dolllars for a housewarming gift. When Mom was not sick her Grandson has never been involved in her life and never ever calls her or even remembers her Birthdays or Holidays. Mom tells me she does not want to talk to anyone, I said to her yesterday when her son left and he said to her that her grandson would like some money for housewarming she said no she would not send him anything. I don't feel like it is my responsibility to contact family members on Mom's behalf am I correct??
I have notified my sister of all situations concerning my Mother she stopped caring when Mom went from being a baby sitter to needing one. Now that Mom has outlived her Money...WELL ..... need I say anything else?????
I agree with Jeanne. The only times we let our mom's siblings know about mom is when she goes to the hospital and is "iffy" in health. However, on the last "iffy health situation", her siblings all came at one time and "visited each other in the waiting room. They came to mom's room, showed face for a few minutes and left. Then they spent hours in the waiting room, talking, laughing, etc... We did not appreciate that. So, after that, any time mom goes in and is hospitalized, we decided to not to call her siblings. We will call when we know that mom is at "death's door." Plus, they haven't visited mom for years. No excuse not to visit their own sister. However, if any of your relatives do visit or call regularly, then I would say out of respect for that person who found the time to follow up on mom, then I would update that person as mom continues to decline.
Sorry there is not need for any housewarming gift. Grandmother needs her money for whatever her needs might be in the future.
Your brother sounds as if he has his priorities all messed up.
Tell your brother to come stay with your Mom for a weekend so you could get a break. During his visit he can ask Mom whatever questions he has for her during his visit. Have her make any calls while he's there etc. """Make sure you hide the check book.""" If he disagrees to this say why not? She's your mother and it's your son who is in need of a Gift and the only and most important gift he should be thinking about is Mom's care, and the need of her children's and grandchild's love. Then explain to him if he should someday be needing care as his Mom is now.... how would he want his children and grandchildren to treat him?
ROTF LOL This is usually when I get hung up on!!! By my Sister
Perhaps if Mom goes into the hospital or has some medical event you have responsibility to let your broher (and other siblings, if any) know. But if Mom does not want to call her grandson or to give money to her grandson, I don't see that you have any responsibility in the matter.