I am 43 & caring for my 91 yr old mother. I can't go anywhere because she requires insulin injections & no one else can give them. Hopefully some respite care will get approved through Medicaid soon but they do not cover injections. I am losing my mind.. No other family to help out.
June 1st, I had literally given up asking, begging, threatening fam for help...even alerting them of the finalized details of my suicide plan. I had given up and even set up the date for Friday. But, there was also a part of me that did Not want to die. So, I remembered this site, got on it and posted for Help.
I will say that between commentors here and my one-time therapy, that I had to accept some very hard advice. You hit it on the nail - all based on Your Perspective.
1. My family does not care for me. Therefore, I need to care for me. (therapist)
2. My siblings have the Right Not to Care for parents. (Hard to swallow at the time)
3. To avoid the constant stress/depression of fam Not Helping, I need to separate
myself from siblings. Very difficult to do but it does really work!
4. We - you and I - Chose to Care for our parents. If we did not, we wouldn't be
here.
5. Times like this, only Other Caregivers can appreciate and understand our
stress. And can give us Excellent Advice.
How we respond to the advice is how we will handle the stress of caring for parents. It won't lessen the load, but it will help us with US. I need to be really careful of the "me". Because I'm still suicidal, I need to keep alert to the pressures. I just recently had a bit of depression and one regular commentor on this site noted my "lack" of comments. It was she who alerted me that I was again going down the "depression" path. I had even posted on my thought of the day: Life Sucks!. You would have think that would have alerted me that I was going downhill.
So, I'm just saying, it's very important to re-adjust your perspective - daily! You all take care! (Connie, go for it - with the RV trip!)
So hang in there it isn't what we expected our lives to be, but with a little help we will all get through it. My prayers are with all of you, for each other and for our aging love ones.
First steps would be looking for a Private Duty Caregiver that can give insulin shots, monitor glucose levels, blood pressure, diet, etc., - Caregivers through agencies are limited per policies.
You can place a caregiver Ad with specifics on care needs and hours on Craigslist or Care.com, and make sure to check backgrounds, etc.
If you can schedule coverage for when you are off from work to get time to rest yourself, that would help you have time for yourself as you need to care for you too!
Let us know how it goes! Live-in care givers are the best to have, I have found as you do not have to worry about them showing up to work on time, getting back home on time for them to go home, etc. Just start time when they come in for shift, and when they are going home for day or two off, some like to live-in 24/7.
AS far as Medicaid covering her respite care... if she can go to an in pt stay, then they will have nurses that can help with the insulin and blood sugar readings.. but you might want her Doc to write an order specifically stating she has to have her insulin administered. As long as its deemed medically necessary, caid should provide that service
Go to the top of this page where you see blue-colored blocks. Hover over the area on right that shows, 'Caregiver support' then, from the drop down list look for n press 'Find Agencies on Aging.' I think u just fill out information of what state you r living n it should give you a contact #. This is I think but don't quote me, a nonprofit organziation. I know, I have not had to pay them anything for their services. They have already done an assessment. n follow-up. They have helped me with local resources as for Respite Care places, financial issues n support groups for yourself as well. Maybe they can help with the situation of taking care of a person with diabetes that is insulin dependent. Also, if the person with glucoma can see through a magnifying glass n they can take care of themselves, u can sometimes buy a sm magnify glass that slips over the syringe from a local pharmacy not sure over the epi-pen but I bet their is something.
I would also check out alz.org for help n explain the reason n what u need help with n maybe they can help some of y'all that r needing help. I hope this is some help for y'all. Remember to stop n breathe.
Some caregivers find support groups helpful. They allow caregivers to share their experiences & exchange information. Some support groups may be linked to hospice care organizations, stress management or exercise classes. Support groups will remind you that it is not selfish for you to feel frustrated, overwhelmed, resentful, etc. and to help you find ways to attend to your own needs.
Support groups can be in person or they can be online. One of the best ways to find groups in your area is through the Family Caregiver Support Program in your state. Contact your local Area Agency on Aging (AAA) through the Eldercare Locator, 800-677-1116 toll free. If you want to talk with caregivers who are in similar situations, the AARP Web site has online forums where you can ask and answer questions, share your caregiving experiences, and learn from others.
Try to stay positive. With your mother being 91, your circumstances are bound
to improve before long.
you put so much of your life on hold to care for an elderly sick parent. Lord only knows. Hang in there, there is a bright side somewhere.
Is the reason she can't give hersef her shots her vision problems? Does she have other impairments that interfer, such as poor memory or confusion?
How often does she need shots in a day? Is the dose determined by blood sugar readings and other factors, or is it set to some standard amount? Would an insulin pump simplify the situation to some degree?
Your mother needs insulin. If the case worker is trying to arrange for some respite care and he or she is not including a way for your mother to get that insulin, then the case worker is not arranging the right thing! This is not about Medicaid "not covering injections." It is more likely about ordering the correct kind of assistance. If mother is eligible for homemaking services, for example, you can't tell the house cleaner, "Oh, by the way, while you are there give Ma her insulin shot." Whatever programs she is on, there are some rules about who can do what kind of services.
Giving your mother her insulin injections is tying you to her excessively. It also puts her at risk should something happen to you temporarily. What if you are sitting in an ER waiting to have a broken bone set when it is time for Mother's injection?
Have you had a serious talk with Mother's case worker about the insulin requirements?
Good luck