Constant anxiety attacks over this stupid virus!

I'm not proud to say this, but I am consuming rather large quantities of alcohol.

I take melatonin at night which helps me sleep. I am currently involved in a community fundraising project which gives me some focus.

We had Zoom services this morning at my synagogue. That helped some.

((((((Hugs)))))))).

Taking magnesium and zinc nightly helps tremendously.

Combined, they help your body produce melatonin, magnesium is the mineral that is important for our nervous system, among many other things. Zinc is good for the immune system and supports other bodily functions.

I wonder if you are not deficient in some vitamins and minerals because of the chemo.

I always try the natural solution when something gets wonky.

Sent you a message.

From the beginning I have not really worried about the Virus and I live in NJ with the high numbers. But that is North and I am in the Southwest. As of yesterday we have 170 cs since 3/27 when they started keeping records and that has gone up since they have started testing those with symptoms.

My BIL is a Dr. of Immunology. He says all you can do is take precautions. Wash your hands, stay at home unless u need to go out for necessities. Wear a mask. He says Dr. Fauci may know what he is talking about concerning his expertise but he knows nothing about immunology. So, if you haven't, stop watching the news. I have. A lot of wrong info out there. A lot of speculation.

I am basically a homebody. I do miss eating out, it was my social time. I do cook and we do pick up. I take clorox wipes with me to wipe down shopping carts. Still wear reg gloves so that helps.

I don't suffer from anxiety but I do overwhelm easily. I can only imagine how scary the feeling is. We cannot control what is going on outside our homes. My BIL says it will die out just follow the precautions.

MidKid, does music soothe you? If so, try that; it works wonders for me, as does reading gardening magazines or fast paced novels. Small housing projects help as well; just cleaning out an area can refocus the mind, which I think is the basis of avoiding and controlling anxiety.

Do you dance, or work out? Tai Chi is relaxing, good for the body, but not demanding or potentially dangerous like going to a gym.

Are you eating any foods that might aggravate anxiety? Do you eat something like turkey with tryptophan at night to help you sleep? Don't drink coffee in the evening?

I won't deny that I often have sleepless nights, so I try to dream of my garden and the elaborate plans I have for it but probably won't ever be able to accomplish. Planning is a good diversion.

When my sister was dying of cancer, we both had sleepless nights, so we played CDs of specifically calming music, such as waves lapping on a shore. Later I used those as well as harp music to calm me before I went to bed.

Or I think about how much worse it could be. Gov. Cuomo made some good points today, citing the duration of WWI, WWII, the Spanish Flu and Great Depression. He pointed out that this pandemic in the US, has only last 56 days so far. (I think he was referring only to NY though as it's just beginning to affect some states.)

I often remember my father's tales of standing for hours in bread lines, in cold weather, or my mother tale's of being cold b/c they had no coal to heat the house.

Perhaps because we haven't experienced anything like this in our generation, we're also not experienced in coping, and I won't deny that it is frightening. I sometimes wonder how long I'll be here if I become infected. That motivates me to inventory my possessions and decide who I want to have them, as well as to start big cleanup projects. (I wouldn't want my heirs to see all the accumulated fabric and yarn, quilting, knitting and crochet magazines and books I have!)

You are not alone! I can't work from home, so I haven't the enormous amount of empty time on my hands to deal with, but I still feel like I'm scuttering back into my hutch like a little rabbit every time I finish my shift. Yesterday there was a mix up and a coworker arrived at a client's house ten minutes after I'd got there - we almost ran into one another's arms, we were so excited to see a friendly face.

(It's fine. We were both gloved, masked, goggled, aproned and awash with sanitizers. It would have been the purest hug ever, but anyway we managed to halt more than six feet apart.)

By the way, not afraid, but please could you be as strict as possible about not catching this. It would not be a clever thing for you especially to do.

I think the best word is apprehension. As far as I can recollect, there hasn't been an experiment before now in literally shutting down the world's economy. We none of us can possibly guess what the fallout will be, and nobody sensible is even pretending they can tell us. It is too big and too complex.

But, so, we can stick our heads under the bed and wait for our backsides to bear the brunt; or we can be sensible, follow policy guidelines, and then do what needs doing once we know what it is and how we can contribute.

Meanwhile. Is there a strictly academic subject you've ever wished you'd given more effort back in the day? Something that would really force you to focus? There are a lot of excellent online courses out there, in among the dross.

I have no anxiety at all and am rather enjoying a slower pace, less traffic, just everything much quieter.

Mid, maybe you are trying to do too much with the baking and sewing. Try taking a few brisk walks every day to see if that may help. Yoga, pilates, solitare, Tai chi like GA suggested. What are you doing for you?

Midkid58 my mother has had anxiety all her life. Lately she takes a few sips of alcohol to calm down. She has anxiety attacks regularly. I do online counseling with my therapist and it is just like seeing her in her office. We use something similar to FaceTime. It really helps. Sometimes antidepressants help with that big black hole you are talking about. I’ve had that before also and antidepressants helped me tremendously. There is help out there. Please don’t suffer in silence.

No matter how overwhelmed I feel, my hour or more practicing is the island of calm in my day.

If you have ANY hobby or passion that requires enjoyable but intense concentration on a NON-VERBAL activity, give it a shot.

If you can think of something that will give you a rewarding result, all the better. Crocheting? Piano? Making gourmet jelly? Macrame? Painting, crayons, sculpture, woodworking?

OR go online and find a site where you can learn something BRAND NEW, that you’ve always longed to learn, but never had the time for.

I think one of the WORST things about this is that NONE of us really know when we’ll be sprung. All the more reason why a mindless longish term project is such a good idea.

You’re creative and a fine writer Midkid- gear up and think of something outside the box to do instead of worrying about your worry willies.

GOOD LUCK!!!

However, that certainly doesn't mean you should drink too much Cannonou wine. Sardinians drink on average three or four small glasses a day spread throughout the day with every meal, including breakfast!Feb 9, 2018

https://www.sardinianplaces.co.uk/blog/fava-beans-longevity-and-sardinian-cannonau-wine

The Sardinian Diet and Longevity
Sardinians are known for living well into their 90s and living to over 100 is not uncommon. A major contributing factor is their diet, including the antioxidant-rich compounds found in Cannonau de Sardegna wines.

😉😉😉

(Laughing) I don't drink alcohol and I don't drink coffee. If I drank, I know it would be to an excess and that's not helping anyone.

I am completely obeying the orders for our state. we have a very small # of cases and very few deaths--and I believe all were older, ill people.

I understand the 'math' and I do not listen to Dr Fauci at all--I think he's enjoying his time in the spotlight, but he's just terrifying us all.

I laid down to rest after delivering the masks and hitting the grocery store. Konked out for 3 solid hours. I'm up now, but feel like I could just go to bed, for the night.

Having my DH home all the time is really hard. He's messy and loud and is not the least bit sympathetic (not shocking to know, this is definitely just as hard to be quarantined with as I had thought).

I think I am just going through something--probably doing way too much to keep myself distracted. And I am still heaing from chemo, so I don't know what it chemo 'leaving' and just being anxious.

Appreciate the comments and will try some meditation pocasts my daughter swears by!

I would definitely take advantage of your therapist's options for a session. You are working through a lot. It's really not fair that you finished chemo and then get hit with this situation! And many of us are getting a bird's eye view of what it's going to be like when our spouses retire. Can't kick that can down the road much longer! That's a big adjustment all by itself.
You have so many layers of things that could cause you extra anxiety- don't try to do this alone, especially if you already have a therapist you like.

Yes, retirement is right around the corner for a lot of us and we will be around our spouse 24/7. My husband retired December 2019 but I still have 4 more years before I retire.

Midkid,

I think your feeling the way you are because you just went through a life altering experience and then Covid-19 hit and just when your life started to make sense again it got turned upside down with Covid and DH being home! You have shown all of us just how strong you really are because YOU showed cancer who was boss!

I think the black cloud you feel is just all the crazy changes you have gone through and perhaps not being able to just run to the store or whatever it is that you like to do--you can't...we all are feeling some kind of feelings about how we can't do whatever is our normal.

As much as we love our hubby's or SO they can be a pain when they are home to much because we are just not use to it and it throws us for a loop. Just try to relax, deep breathes, and light a few purple and white candles to clean the air and talk to your therapist.

I suffer from anxiety as well and it can be difficult, but I have found that if I keep my brain busy I have less attacks. I lose myself in watching a good TV show, movies, reading a book, playing a game on my phone, go for a walk or drive, doing house projects, cooking and/or baking my list goes on and on, but you get my point!

I think you will feel better when DH goes back to work and you can go back to doing the things and going to the places you like.

Side note: Some Benzos can make anxiety attacks worst...for me there is only one kind of Benzo I can take because the other ones seem to make me have anxiety attacks, if that makes sense.

Hugs!!

Dear MidKid,
Calm has free meditations right now. I get them in my email and they are free I do not subscribe. I like them. I am new at that kind of thing but it helps. Hubby's at home here too. We are going they junk in the garage. What fun. Not. Hang in there sugar!

Please watch this:

https://youtu.be/HVailav65Fc

Mid

You just got off of the scariest roller coaster ride of your life. You were ready for some stability. It’s normal for you not to want the ups and downs for awhile. You had no choice but to be back on the roller coaster.

I know that you are grateful that your chemo was successful but the fear of the cancer returning is always in the back of one’s mind. It’s not being negative. It’s acceptance of a possible future reality.

So, this coronavirus may have pushed you close to the edge. It happens. You reached your threshold and had a panic attack.

I have been sewing masks too. It’s a good feeling to help but you may need to do something else to disconnect from the Covid-19. Mask making is a constant reminder of it.

Maybe you could sew little stuffed animals for children to play with. I love sewing those. Look online for free patterns. Years ago I made several for children in a Head Start program. I bet lots of young children who are quarantined would love them.

I think the majority of us have some anxiety in this awful situation and I think some of us have more reasons than others with valid concerns for our health. You fall into that category. Your anxiety is going to fluctuate.

You just got over chemo. You are vulnerable emotionally and physically. Let’s face it, the timing stinks! You didn’t get a breather before you had to jump back in.

I understand your concerns about meds. I think you will receive a variety of opinions on this forum. Some people strongly believe in meds, others do not. It’s fine to ask how others feel but I feel that your doctor would be the best person to answer your questions about meds.

Could you do a telehealth appointment? That’s the first thing that I would look into. You may need a different med than you are taking or something else in addition to what you are taking.

Talking to a therapist is an excellent idea. They are scheduling telehealth appointments. Take advantage of that.

You mentioned prayers. Do you think it would help to speak to clergy as well? Or stream your church service to view.

I am sorry that you are struggling with these attacks.

Also, I would not consider taking any supplements before speaking to your doctor. Supplements can be useful but there are situations where they are not suitable and can actually cause harm. Again, I feel that your doctor who knows your personal history is best to speak to first in these circumstances.

I wish you well, Mid. Please let us know how you are doing. We care! 💗

I can relate. I’ve always had anxiety, and I’m on medication. A panic attack actually woke me up the other night. It was horrible. I prayed then sang spiritual songs in my head to calm down and focused on the words of the song. It finally passed. They are not fun at all that’s for sure. My anxiety is worse now then it has ever been, going through the change of life. But I admit I watch too much news too. So in that part, I do it to myself. Hope you find some relief. Xoxo

I didn't add into this mess that the week that Dh started working from home--I came down with shingles. Seriously! Luckily I knew what it was and got on and antiviral almost immediately, but this is a serious cruddy disease! I scratched my right hip so bad I was bleeding. Found some Lidocaine patches and slapped them on all the hotspots and it really helped, but it hurt all day, for 2 weeks. Not as bad as a lot of people, I've heard about, but just--annoying.

Couple of nights ago I was up for several hours wiht full blown heart pounding panic attack. I did finally get it calmed down, but the next day was awful and I woke up AGAIN--but dealt wiht it and it went away, but I didn't sleep. Yesterday I was just SICK...lack of sleep and stress---I told DH where the leftovers were and went to bed at 5 pm. Slept like a rock for several hours and woke up once with a panic attack just starting to get me...I took benzo and laid there and did my deep breathing exercises. Had a better night.

I will be contacting my psych doc. He will NOT EVER give me one single more benzo that I am already prescribed (although my PCP would--but I cannot play one against another!)--maybe I need a beta blocker again. I don't know.

Dh and I were going to gut the garage and take a lozd to the dump. He went instead and bought a big tool chest and had to raise the workbench to fit it over this massive thing. The garage looks 100xs worse than before, I want to cry, I KNOW he won't finish this job and the garage will be a hot mess for months. The kicker is: My DH doesn't USE the tools he has. Ever. We don't NEED this thing! I threw away a ton of gardening stuff that I will not use, all my garden tcotckes and extra pots--using maybe 3 small shelves. He blames ME for the fact the garage is always messy...he's not wrong, I'm the only one who uses it! And, no I don't always clean up after myself. But I cleaned a lot and threw away a lot--but he has junk spread from heck to breakfast. I can't look at it.

I'm not doing ANY compassionate service projects this week--I need to calm down. I'm also praying that DH gets to go back to work in the EMPTY warehouse his company has had him working at. He'd be gone all day and I am really needing a break from him.

We'll see a few of our grands today, but not all. One family--they don't feel the other family has quarantined properly, so they won't come down.

Thanks for just letting me rant. I know nobody can do anything for me, but it fels good to just be able to say what I feel. DH thinks my panic attacks are stupid, and I just need to relax. Well, I try to relax and he's constantly coming after me to come help him do something or run to the hardware store.


Funny--what I REALLY wanted him to do was build a very simmple gate next to the garage so we could have some concrete space to put the trash cans, etc. $1000 later and that gate is nowhere near being done. FIRST he has to organize his garage and then he can think about the stupid gate.

The gate would have cost me $800 from a contractor. Dh said that was waaay too much, but it will cost me another $1000 before he's finished doing his garage cleanout. IF he finishes!

This may not be something for you, but it helps me. During the day I paint, which I consider work for actual scheduled exhibitions, which may or may not happen this year, but I feel compelled to have the paintings finished anyway. In the evenings, instead of tv or internet, I draw. Just sitting with attention to how things look and how I can transfer that to the paper brings me to a comfortable grounding. It's good for the soul to practice developing skills. When the soul is given attention, the body is better. And drawing is not as active as painting, so it brings stillness. Soon, I will have to get back to teaching and it will be online, which causes me distress, and I will have the exact problems you are having, so I will try to take my own advice to continue to draw in the evenings for a couple of hours. I also eat a banana before bed. If the bananas are gone, I have some yogurt.

Artist Daughter, you made an insightful comment on the conceptualization of reality into art on paper. I think this is probably why I'm constantly sketching plans for new gardens. I've developed a real fondness for formal gardens, and keep a sketchpad close by so I can jot down designs and flesh them out. Some of them may never come to fruition, primarily b/c as I age it's less easy to move natural and patio stones and things around for new designs.

But just thinking about it redirects my thoughts and soothes my mind.

First you are a superstar. Every mask you made has the potential to keep someone safe and others. That’s superhero stuff. Plus you’re beating Cancer!

Everyday I hear about transitions and that saddens me. I wish I didn’t get the daily news with the numbers but I did slow down the news. I rarely watch the news anymore.

im staying at home and slowing down to enjoy the time I have left. I can’t waste it worrying. Heck I could have an accident anytime and be outta here so this little piece of time left I’m gonna enjoy and live.

Watering my vegetable garden that I started, Calling old friends, listening to good music that fills my soul and writing to loved ones to share happy memories.

In short live. You are here now so be here and give all the love you can. ❤️

All throughout history when people are sick, they have been quarantined; in their home, in a hospital, on a ship. Why do you suppose they are quarantining EVERYONE in this instance? Just say'in.....

Midkid, in addition to music, I find listening to a book as I fall asleep helps turn the mind off my worries and aches. I use the audible app from my phone or fire stick to play a book on a sleep timer. The Harry Potter books are my favorites - the narrator's voice is soothing and there's just enough imaginative dialog to engage the mind without picking at any of my worries. Audible books are also useful when you're feeling wasted; something to engage the mind when you don't have enough energy to even read a book.

I don't have any other advice to offer, just know I'm cheering you on while you go through all this crap...bug virtual hugs and a virtual shoulder to lean/cry on!!

`So called panic attacks are horrible and frightening. They are caused by severe malnutrition. The malnutrition is usuially caused by strong diuretics, statins, or some other so called medication that interferes with the processing of nutrients in the body.Chemo severely interferes with processing of nutrients and is probably causing your "panic attacks".The other meds you are taking also cause draining of nutrients. A sublingual B12 tablet will almost always give immediate temporary relief. You need however, if possible, to discontinue the nutrition draining so called meds. You also need to take a sublingual B12 every morning and to eat some kind of very magnesium rich foods every day. Spinach and all kinds of nuts and seeds are rich in magnesium. Both the sublingual B12 and the magnesium rich foods must be taken daily to keep you free from the "panic attacks.It is unsafe to take magnesium as a supplement. You must get it from food. B12 is absolutely safe and can have no side effects.You also need to eat at least one whole egg every day and drink a lot of whole milk or eat a lot of any kind of yogurt.These kinds of safe natural remedies will also help with any other nervous system problems such as so called depression.Another good result will be protection from osteoporousis and other maladies. Needless to say, organic berries, fruits, and veggies are also important. However, the best food in the world will not keep you healthy unless you are able to quit all nutrition draining substances. God bless you and heal you.

Indeed, it has been scientifically proven that magnesium supplements can be very unsafe and should always absolutely always be taken only under a doctor's supervision. It is very important that you know that. B12, on the other hand is very safe and can be bought over the counter.I enjoy doing a lot of research.I grow my on berries, fruits, and veggies in my back yard. Almost everybody did that when I was a child. However, organic purchased produce is probably just as good.Really pure trus food is the best medicine always. Some supplements are good and safe . Some are not.Really healthy food is much cheaper than unhealthy food.Even if a person pays extra for organic produce, they spend less overall becausae good whole eggs, beans, and lentils are much cheaper than meat.I am not talking about a vegetarian diet; just less meat and more beans and eggs.Love to all!

Midkid, do you have any Chicken Soup for the Soul books? I switched last night from fiction to a Chicken Soup book, of which I have over a dozen, and actually laughed for the first time in weeks. It was a good, relaxing laugh.

I'm going to start reading the Chicken Soup anecdotes every morning.

In fact, given the frustration that DH is causing you, perhaps you might very secretly start your own collection of his activities, not necessarily to publish, but to channel your anxiety. I can see an anecdote about his cleaning approach to the garage.

A series that I've found very helpful throughout any kind of tragedy, frustration, incompetence at a high level, or with people, are the Trevor Greive books, illustrated with cute, clever, sometimes adorable and sometimes laughable animals.

It's not a book in the sense of a plot, or extensive reading. Each animal photo illustrates a particular point, or thought.

https://www.thriftbooks.com/a/bradley-trevor-greive/217253/

I find humor just by skimming through this website; one of my favorite book covers is "Dieting Causes Brain Damage." I don't have the book...yet.

The Blue Day Book was especially helpful; it was a gift from close friends after my sister died. I still skim through it every now and then.

I find reading comforting verses from the Bible to be helpful. I will mention just a couple of them.
Isaiah 41:10 “Do not be afraid for I am with you. Do not be
anxious for I am your God. I will fortify you, yes I
will help you. I will really hold on to you with my
right hand of righteousness.”
Philippians 4:6,7 “Do not be anxious over anything, but in
everything by prayer and supplication along with
thanksgiving, let your petitions be made known to
God; and the peace of God that surpasses all
understanding will guard your hearts and your
mental powers by means of Christ Jesus.”
I also find this website jw.org to be an excellent tool in finding comforting Bible verses. I hope this helps.

A vegetarian diet is very unhealthy and can even be dangerous as it was for your sister. On the other hand, eating too few berries, fruits, and veggies each day can be equally bad.Some supplements are good or even sometimes necessary. Some are dangerous unless supervised by a doctor. Magnesium must be supervised by a doctor."panic attacks" and or other nervous system disorders are often caused by nutritional deficienciesSublingual B12 can give immediate temporaRY RELIEF FOR A "PANIC ATTACK". Taken daily, sublingual B12 along with the eating of a lot of spinach, nuts, seeds , and lots of altogether healthy foods can indeed permanently cure "opanic attacks" and other nervous system disorders.Statins and some other so called meds do indeed interfere with the processing of nutrients in ther body. As you said, the info is out there and it pays to do careful research.

Special thanks to Jionesiegirl. Isiah 41:10 is my special life verse. All your words are so comforting. God bless you.