Does anyone else's parent cry for no reason? Some days, minutes or hours my Mom cries and cries. Singing stops them sometimes, but certainly not always. Hugs and reassurance is how I try and stop it, telling her everything is okay, etc. but it really doesnt work well. Sometimes its on and off the entire day, some days not at all. She cant really speak well to tell me whats wrong but I dont think she knows either. Sometimes she is hysterically happy and very funny, I wish that was all the time. Sometimes I get get her to laugh in the middle of a cry too, its strange. I am sure its not for attention because I sit right with her, rubbing her back, telling her I love her, and telling her stories. This has gone on for a very long time now and my patience is really being tested.
Am I alone here with this?
I don't have much left to give myself and that makes me sad because I think I am letting her down. But if I did what she wanted of me, I would need to be at her beck and call 24/7. It feels like a weight around my neck.
So I plug along and try to figure out what is best for her. I've made some progress lately, so we'll see how it goes. thanks for your comment.
I encourage her to do the things she used to like or can still do but, lately, she doesn't even seem to like those things.
It makes me feel so frustrated because I am a natural "fixer-upper" and some things just cannot be fixed. I found that the best thing for her mental health is to redirect her energies. I find a project for her or get her talking about times in the past that were fun.
The hardest thing is to accept that she is growing older and slipping away from me and that stinks. The time we have now is just "maintenance" time...doing basic care. There is not much mother/daughter time anymore - she just sees me as someone who does "stuff" for her. I try not to take it personally because I know she goes into panic mode very easily now.
I don't think my Mom does it for attention either...I just think that guage that keeps all of us from melting down in the middle of the grocery store has ceased working for her. However, indulging these episodes just makes it worse.
So here we are again, between a rock and a hard place.