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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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Without more details, I’m just gonna go for it-Get him out of the house and clean it up anyway. Too bad he doesn’t like it you gotta do what you gotta do and it’s in the name of love and doing the right thing- he’ll just have to deal with it. Good luck
Move him out. Tell him he can participate or you will make the arrangements, then do it. This is your home too, and your life he is trashing, It is non-negotiable. If he can't keep his environment clean he has to live where someone will do it for him. That someone isn't you!
I just read ur other post. Does Dad have Dementia. If not, your home your rules. Maybe you should have put down a Pergo type floor. That dog would be gone. Your Dad should be paying for the destruction it is causing.
If he has Dementia place him this situation is not working. If he doesn't have Dementia, he needs to find a place to live. You have a right to set boundries. If he won't abide by them you have a right to ask him to find another place to live.
If he is deemed competent, there is nothing you can do to make him change. All you can do is change how you deal with it. You can either try and help or refuse to go to his house until he changes (he won't change). The only thing you can do is wait until he is either considered incompetent and unable to care for himself or for a disaster to happen.
Sorry to hear this. What kind of filth are we talking about? Food? Trash? General hoarding? How long has this been going on? Does he live alone? In a house or apartment?
At his age and living in filth, I have to wonder if he has some cognitive decline going on. If this is really unhealthy and unsanitary, I think something really has to be done about it, whether he agrees to it or not. Not having ever had to deal with this myself, I am at a loss for how exactly to proceed, but I wish you the best of luck in improving this situation.
I don’t know what you can do about this situation other than asking him if he would be agreeable to hiring a housekeeper to help him clean up.
I am sorry that you have to see your father living in filth.
Have you contacted Council on Aging in your area? If dad qualifies, he can receive, light housekeeping, simple meals prepared and help with bathing, etc.
It must be beyond difficult to see your dad living this way. Sadly, if he has a sound mind, he’s likely free to live the way he chooses. You can report the situation to your local Adult Protective Services and see if they might be of help. Otherwise, you’ll have to wait out a bad event that will inevitably come and will force change for your dad. That’s an awful feeling, but one many here have experienced. Sorry you’re dealing with this
I’m amending my thoughts now that I see your dad is living in your home. There is no reason to allow this to continue in your home, none. Dad needs more care than you can provide, and he will have to live elsewhere to get it. You need a peaceful and clean home. Dad won’t like it, but clearly his judgment is impaired
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
If he has Dementia place him this situation is not working. If he doesn't have Dementia, he needs to find a place to live. You have a right to set boundries. If he won't abide by them you have a right to ask him to find another place to live.
At his age and living in filth, I have to wonder if he has some cognitive decline going on. If this is really unhealthy and unsanitary, I think something really has to be done about it, whether he agrees to it or not. Not having ever had to deal with this myself, I am at a loss for how exactly to proceed, but I wish you the best of luck in improving this situation.
I am sorry that you have to see your father living in filth.
Have you contacted Council on Aging in your area? If dad qualifies, he can receive, light housekeeping, simple meals prepared and help with bathing, etc.