I have been caring for my 87-year-old dad for over a year now. I am there EVERY day, all day. He lost my mom one year ago, and she waited on him hand and foot. He is totally competent although he does have a hard time getting around. He expects me to fill my moms shoes and do everything for him. Cook his meals, pay his bills, take him to appointments sort his medicine do his laundry, and spend every minute entertaining him. When I do try to go anywhere he makes me feel guilty with snide remarks like, "When are you coming back? How long will you be gone? OH I suppose the lines were too long and that is what took you so long!" I just feel like a prisoner. I also have a husband that has MS. I leave him every day to care for my dad. I just do not know how to get any relief... please help!!!!!
My mom lived in a county with a population of 360,000....and 4 geriatricians. FOUR!
You cannot believe how shocked I was. While mom's county is partially rural, it is far from the most countrified and/or sparsely-populated county in our state. I guess those folks are really screwed.
Anyhoo, after reading these 4 geri-doctors' bios, two of them had so many other "specialties" that I suspect they were good old GPs who happened to have some elderly patients.
The neighboring county has a more robust selection of geriatric specialists -- thanks to the local university's medical program.
But oh Lordy, spend a whole 60-90 minutes in my car? Each way?? Unthinkable. If Mom's afraid of highways, then everyone should be afraid of highways.
P.S. It's all behind me now, and I don't miss elder-logic one bit. Not. One. Bit.