O.K. So, now mom has moved in with us. Been here for a week. I thought things were going smoothly. BUT -- tonight there was a problem, and I need some feedback as to how to handle this diplomatically. We have a separate bathroom set up for just my mother outside of her bedroom. It has a special seat with handles on the toilet, and I KNOW that nobody else uses it. Well, tonight the toilet overflowed. I guess I hadn't thought too much about the fact that she uses '1' roll of toilet paper a Day! This is a lot of information, but, she wipes and then takes maybe ten(?) squares of t.p. and folds it and puts it on top of her diaper (I guess for extra absorption), then pulls up her pants. Of course, when she sits down next time, the pad of paper falls into the toilet, and she wipes again, etc., over and over. I didn't realize she was going through so much paper, and also just realized that the kleenex box is also empty. When I tried to gently ask her tonight to use less paper and maybe not fold a bunch in her pants, and just wipe -- she accused me of picking on her. She says that she does NOT do what I said, and that someone else is trying to blame her. I nicely told her that she had frequent problems in the last place she lived with overflowing toilets, and she claimed that was just not so. I said that our septic tank just could not handle all that paper, and that I didn't want to think of an overflowed toilet happening when we were not there. So, other than rationing her paper -- what should I do? She slammed her door, saying we were picking on her. I know that there will be disagreements, but, how should I handle this? Please help!
It's unlikely she will take kindly to any suggestion here, but it's something you have to go through. Maybe, if you find a different brand of pad, explaining that this one won't need the "extra protection" of the toilet paper pad, it may help.
Take care of yourself and try not to pull out your hair,
Carol
I would think if she needs extra absorbency, she should have a smaller depend shield or little Huggie placed in to catch any potential leaking. Maybe a nice little bag lined garbage can next to her toilet would make her feel safe and privately in charge of discarding anything damp. It's nice to see a little pride in herself. Get what she needs, say little and give her a hug. Good luck. ~ Sooz