She is currently still working but the ladies at work is helping her alot. She is still driving but only to and from work. But we know that she either went into the ditch or hit something because she has mud up one side of her van. She forgets if she has eaten or taken her medicine. My aunt and uncle is living with her for now. But she says come June they are moving out it is her house and she has lived in it by herself since dad dies and she can still do it. But we can't get her to understand it is for her own good. She thinks we are trying to make her nuts. I would love for us to be wrong. She has changed doctors because she doesn't like that doctor for saying she has Alheimers. So now she is seeing a new doctor and will NOT let me go with her.
Any ides are welcomed!
It would be great if the new doctor found out it was medication or something that was causing her symptoms. If only you could go along. It's always hard. Stick with this great group for support.
Carol
welcome to this sight. You will meet a lot of people who will listen and offer suggestions without judging.
One thing I would like to suggest is that your mom is in denial and is very frightened right now. I can only imagine her fear, and if she can keep this from being true by continuing on as if nothing is wrong, changing Dr.s, then give her the time to adjust to this. She will eventually accept it or not.
The lady I work for has dementia and is still in denial that she needs someone with her. I have noticed she brings this up when she has been faced with another limitation, one more thing she can no longer do. I have learned to just let her talk, not try to convince her I need to be there, and after a time, she calms down, or, unfortanetly she forgets why she was upset.
So you are right in being concerned, and it may come to you having to make some hard choices about her care. But try to give her a reasonable amount of time to get used to the idea, because it has to be one of the most frightening things in the world to be told, other than having cancer.
Please keep posting and let us get to know you and how things are going for you and your mom. God Bless
No wonder your mom is in denial. Bless her heart, she has seen what happens first hand, and does not want that to be her. Like I said, try to give her some time to adjust to this news, and be as gentle with her as you can be. Be supportive and try to get her to talk about her fears.
Not knowing what your relationship is, hopefully she will talk to you and you will understand more of what she is facing. I hope for the best for all concerened. Keep posting. God bless
I've learned that dementia doesn't mean loss of self-respect and dignity. If anything, it is more important to have some autonomy, control & be on equal terms once dementia begins to creep in. My mom has taught me so much by how she has managed to retain her humour and grace to this day. I hope that your mom's preview of lessons learned will make it easier for both of you to work through whatever issues crop up from either the dementia, or adjusting to a different season in your relationship.
Hang in there - with an open mind and kindness hopefully you will both get through it.
Susan
Hang in there. Some days will be better than others. I have found that dealing with my aunt(91yrs) who lives with me who has dementia, that you cannot argue and try to make them understand your point of view because they are incapable of mentally processing the information you are giving. they have it in their mind already what it is that they want or think the way thisngs are and you cannot change them. My Mother was in denial for so long until she finally got to the point where she was so physically weak she had to go the hospital. From there we got her to a nursing home. the wait for that was long and hard. Getting medical power of attorney is great IF you can get it. It will allow you more involvement with the medical care. I live in a big city where you have to have documentation for everything you do. So any little thing you can accomplish with her drs. would be a milestone for you. Good luck and just keep hanging in there. Don't give up.
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