My mother wants me to take her by airplane to visit my estranged brother and family (internationally). The have 'blacklisted' me from 'their' family ( excluded me from births, etc). My mother makes me feel worthless because I (as she puts it) "am not married". She can not travel by herself and I told her they are the ones that should come to,visit her (she's going on 89). When they talk with her by phone she makes off lie she's a spry person doing everything on her own (they don't know,how,hard it is for me to care for her... her balance is,way off and she refuses to use a walker). It,would be a nightmare for me (all around) to take her anywhere, especially to a place I'd be unwelcomed. She wants to see her son, grandchildren before,she dies... They've traveled to Hawaii but haven't come to see her.... I am barely hanging on to my life right now, but she disregards my life as anything of value. Talking to her is like talking to a wall.m why should I feel 'guilty' when my life and health is passing quickly before my eyes?!
I thought about how it is. My mother won't do anything without me. She won't even have a visitor without yelling for me. It can be a bit frightening to be in my room and hear her yelling for me in such a frantic way. I feel like her foot sometimes. She can't do anything without me, but I don't get much respect. I just get walked on. She is getting near to the end of her life, so I feel guilty not wanting to do more. Then I think -- goodness! I've given her over 6 years of my life. Why do I feel guilty for not being a better foot?
Say to her: Mom, I COULD NOT POSSIBLY DO THAT!
So sorry that you are having to do this-maybe it is time to save yourself.
This wouldn't be ironic: such a project is quite feasible. He would need to contact an escort agency, such as Universal Aunts, sort out transport from your mother's home to his, and of course provide accommodation and support for her during her stay. He can pay for these services, or your mother can, as they wish; or he can come and get her. What's stopping him?
About how your mother makes you feel… that's another issue. But a break from it wouldn't hurt! :)