I have been caring for my mum as her live-in-caregiver for exactly a year now. I own my own condo which I locked up when I moved in with my mum. One of the thoughts that I think about the most is .. who will look after me when I need care? I am almost 53, single and have no children. It scares me a bit knowing I don't really have anyone to watch out for me or my care when I am old, yet still living at home. Does anyone else have these worries?
I have kids but who is to say they will outlive me or my husband for that matter. I'm going to be as prepared as possible, that's all I can do. I'd sure consider a move to Oregon.
I really don't believe in taking my own life, although I've already been thinking of how I could get enough pills to do it painlessly. I don't think I would ever go through with it, but I don't want to suffer, either.
In my case, I guess the main issue is whether or not my son will outlive me. Since he has Down Syndrome, his life span is shorter than normal according to what I've read. Unfortunately, his chances of having dementia at an early age or having a blood disorder later in life are both pretty high. So if I can't be there for him, and he can't be there for me, who will be there for both of us????
Please, let's keep providing support for each other. The question was "Have you had to face your own fears about who is going to look after you?" The answer is YES.
As for the definition of "caregiver" I am very familiar with what a caregiver is. I have been a geriatric caregiver for almost 30 years, long before I was caring for my mum. Doing banking, and looking after financial matters is not a caregiver. It is a very important duty and it is very helpful but it falls more into the category of POA.
I think my question that I posted PROVES that there is fear about not being cared for because there is such a range of emotion on this topic.
I hope when the time gets closer, you will reconsider and allow "strangers" to help bathe, dress and provide meals for you. This is what they are trained to do and there are many caring individuals out there. I remember years ago my mother always said she would never burden her kids with having to care for her and she wanted to go into a home but then when the time arrived last year, she was more than happy to allow me to care for her. I am more fortunate than many on here as my mum is in a position to pay me a salary. I would not have been able to be her caregiver otherwise, because I have to make a living .. I have no spouse.
Even if my question about having to face your own fears about who is going to care for you doesn't provide all the answers, I hope it will get people thinking and planning for their future!
Going right now to drink some more water :)