No matter what I do for my MIL, I feel like it's never enough. I am having to take care of ALL of her affairs. Right now I am anguishing over whether to keep her in the nursing home when her therapy is played out. She is past her initial 21 days and her secondary insurance is picking up the copay. I started looking into home care costs and what it would mean to bring her home verses leaving her there, paying down her money and applying for Medicaid. So much involved either way. I go up to see her everyday and bring her whatever she gets in her head that she wants. My kids and I took her kitties up to see her, she enjoyed that but cried when they left. I know that she would rather be home. Not my home, hers. She would be happy as a lark if I stayed with her 24/7. But I can't do that. At this point, she would need someone with her that much. She weighs 220 and there is no way I could do it alone. I really would need to have 2 people there all of the time. Regardless of what decision I make, she will run out of money. I feel guilty either way, and either way, there are lots of complications. And "no" I do not have much help in these decisions. Even though she still has 2 sons,( she lost three children) she only wanted me to make these decisions. So I have POA and my name is on her bank acct. the funny thing is, the rest of them seem happy that they don't have to deal with her affairs......ugh!
on this website that have helped me over the years and now this subject is in my headlights too. The trick is making yourself follow the excellent advice to help yourself!
Thank you all so much for your encouragement and advice. It is still hard but better, if that makes sense.