The past month has been super crazy. I have been wanting a break, from mom's health issues, let alone her dementia, but this is not what I meant. I can accept she is gone and in a better place at peace, but now what?
My mom passed away at about 11:45 pm on Wednesday evening. Thursday was spent taking care of her burial arrangements (which luckily she had already did and paid for, so it was more paperwork they anything). Today husband went back to work and brother flew home to Maryland. He will be back on the 19th for the 20th interment.
I spent the day home, yes there where many phones and text messages. Kept self busy with a month's worth of undone housework. But really now what? I stopped my life for the last year and a half to care for her. I am broke, have lost customers, behind on some bills, but I don't know how to just get back to living.
I know it is too soon, just a few days. I am just not sure where to start, plus I think I am in shock of how quickly this all played out.
As I recall your mom's memorial was this weekend ?
My mom and this woman had been friends for years and decided to do a golden girl thing and live and share expenses. Well that did not happen and my mom seemed to pay for everything. Whenever I asked, mom told me not to worry about it.
A few years went by, they had an argument, mom would not tell me about what. Well mom demanded this woman move out, the woman said no my name is on the house so you can't throw me out. Lawyers got involved, this is when I found out what mom had done. Basically it was decided my mom would sign over the house to her and the woman would sign over the water front property to mom. Mom would build a new house. The other choice was to sell both and split the money.
Now this woman claims my mom sign some other paper saying she gets money from her estate at her passing.
I just want to cry, I don't know how people can be like this. She just took advance of my mom.
Yes, I agree...A**H*LES!!!!
Can you drink 1/2 bottle, save the rest for when you abruptly awake at 3:00 a.m.?
This will all be sorted out later. Don't take the information (or mis-information) into your heart at this time. I don't know how to do that, but it sounded like good advice?
Be at peace with yourself now.
I'm so sorry for your loss, Tattoochick. Go into the basement or out into your backyard and throw things. Then try to get a good night's sleep. Hugs.
Now she has heard my mom has passed and has called the executor of the estate claiming to have paperwork from a lawyer drawn up years ago that says she is due money from my mom's estate. Seriously, can't I even mourn for my mom, it has only been a week.
She got ownership of a house she never paid out any money for then sold with in months of getting the deed. Now I have to give her more. What!
I am tired A**H*LES
When our Dad died (I'm one of 6, and thankfully we all got along and were all heavily involved in our parents care), we jumped right into the funeral planning, divying up the nessesary tasks that needed to be accomplished, as well as continue caring for our Mom, who was right in the middle of 33 straight days Radiation therapy for Cancer, and without stopping to get it all done, our Dad was buried 3 days later, in a beautiful Memorial Service.
Then 14 months later (and of course the planning process still fresh in our minds) when our Mom died, we decided to slow the roll, let ourselves have a full days break/rest to actually breathe and feel our loss, before the planning of her funeral/Memorial service was initiated. It made all the difference in the world, not rushing ourselves sick.
I hope that you haven't been so overwhelmed, as it is exhausting, just coming off of all that caregiving, and jumping right into funeral planning, and that you have had some outside help, giving your Mom the send off, that she and you, would have wanted.
God bless, and remember to take care of you! So sorry for your loss! Stacey B
My Mom passed away last month. I have kept busy. Evenings are the hardest. Take on a project you have been wanting I get to.
My sympathy goes to you. Time is the only cure for heartache.
You will cope with all your fears re: your life & job, etc soon enough. Let yourself grieve.
It certainly was a whirlwind for you and your mother the past few weeks. Things happen for a reason - to make us stronger, to develop more patience and empathy and build our character.
Thank goodness you were there to take such good care of your mother! That in itself is an honor- you took care of business...
You completed one of the most humble and loving "jobs" you could ever have done- you did what needed to be done for your mother and was there for her until the end. "Job" is not the correct word, perhaps "labor of love" is a better choice of words.
Life will figure itself out when you've processed this, while you adjust to your "new normal" and then be able to focus back on your career and succeed.
My sympathy is with you at this difficult time.
So sorry for the toll the journey has taken but you can rest knowing you were mom's hero and you didn't fail her
God bless
Show yourself some love................a lot of love. You deserve it.
I'm so sorry for your loss.
To some extent you're in shock. Try to be gentle with yourself. Eat healthy food, try to walk some every day, get as much sleep as you can. It will take a while. Stay close to the people who mean the most to you.
Tattoo, just take your time, do what you can do, when you want to do it. It definitely takes time, and is different for everyone.
Again, my condolences on the loss of your mom.