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Rent an apartment with a 3 to 6 month lease (they are out there) and move her in. I hope she can afford this apartment. Let her rant and rage, but be prepared to put her in ALH. Don't feel guilty, it's the best thing for your whole family. I don't understand how she has been with you that long. It seems she has dementia, but you don't have put up with the treatment or your family.
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F.O.G.!! Ugh
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All of us have been there who have responded and know all too well about dealing with this. I never wanted to become an expert on dementia/alzheimers, but you get an education and learn more than you ever wanted to know. Some of us may sound cold, but you do get that way after awhile, to preserve your sanity. If you mother was a narcissist before and treated you badly, you certainly have NO obligation to have her in your home now abusing you and your family now. Your family should come first. Find a home for mom, and they will take care of
everything. You can go visit and choose how long you will stay and then you can leave when you want to. They will suck the life out of you and rob you of your health...... Don't let that happen.
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glonjoe89, the answers here are good advice.... getting social services involved sounds drastic, but for many of us, it saved our sanity, and gave Mom someone else to blame... DCF and the doctor ... and we 'can't do anything about it'.... hang in there and get your life back!
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I care for my mom in my home as well. She is now in the final stage of Alzheimer's. During my life, she was more absorbed with work and her marriages (she has had 5). I know my mom loves me but I am not sure she liked me ;-). How do you do it? I have found that I can't dwell or worry about anything from before. She is my mom, I love her, and she needs my care. I treat her in a loving way, care for her needs, and focus on me staying positive. Read all there is about demensia. If your mom won't get a diagnosis, just treat as if you have one. Look for videos and information from Teepa Snow and Naomi Feil. Evaluate if you can handle it at home. If not, I would look into placement. It doesn't sound like she should live alone.
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