My mother is 58. She is disabled and we are currently waiting for disability to be approved. This process has been going on for 18 months now. The state of MD has some very old laws on the books about children having to take care of their "elderly" parents. Even though she doesn't qualify for any elder programs. She isn't contributing monetarily or otherwise to my household and yet she is draining my finances for her medication, and she has become verbally and physically abusive to my two daughters. How do I get her out of my home?
The police were present and tased granny and shut off her oxygen supply. She go severe burns from the taser gun and spent 90 days in psych lock up. She and her grandson are suing the state. Here's a link to the story:
I think that the issues here are far more deep seeded than any of us strangers will ever know. There is a level of anger & resentment that seems to be very obvious in these comments about your mother.
I cannot comment on the American medical or social availability of resources as I am in a country where everyone has free medical available if they are under our
Version of * Medicade* together with an amazing structure in place to assist those in a less financially stable situation than your mother.
It also sounds that your mother is obviously not stable in her own right, as I know as a grand mother myself, with 14, 4, & 2 yr old grand children, I would never yell or scream at them. More than anything else It sounds like your mother either has not accepted her disability or is actually angry at herself for being in this situation. ( I live with & care for my disabled & elderly Aunt, )
Their lashing out is not actually at others as it seems, it's really directed at themselves.
Maybe.... You can invest a little time to take her to see someone with whom she can discuss these outbursts,These are sometimes really cries for help in their own way, but our frustrations at situations amplify the core issues at hand & it
may also help you & your family in the process.
Good luck! & don't write your Mama off, as remember we never know what may happen to us one day, & your children are witness to your family dynamic with your mother as well. You may need them one day!
I wish you all the best, I hope your burden is lightened for you soon with some governmental assistance. & an understanding support system you may be able to reach out for. :)