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Anone know how much home health care costs in the NY/Long Island area? We would need light aide care (dressing/showers), light housekeeping and cooking, dementia care companions and someone to be there overnight, just in case something happens.

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You're not describing home health care (wound care, administering IVs, etc.) You are describing personal aide stuff.

I'm in the Bay Area of California. My ILs do this on the cheap and probably inadvisably so. They pay $170K a year for the 24/7. About $30 an hour for the SIL to come over for 40 hours. About $20 for the night/weekend indy for 120+ hours a week, whom they should never anger or else they could easily, very easily, be sued over the labor conditions.

If you were to do it right, with everyone getting taxes taken out and so forth, we're probably talking about $240K a year. And that's without dementia.

I really feel that you should stick to the plan of siccing an attorney on her CCRC, if only to keep her in a familiar environment that she paid for already, especially if you're going to pay private people in addition. You may find that this place backs down pretty fast, so I would try that first.
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