My mom is almost 90 and physically pretty healthy, but she complains about everything. She said she wishes she could die. This has been going on for 3 years. I try to remain positive because that is who I am. She hates everything but me (I think). I am an only child and visit her every other day. Old age is not kind to her body that bruises so easily, her teeth, which she has take care of, are now breaking off or falling out. She is lonely and outlived her friends that she use to talk to. Her friends now are two people that are in their 50s that are so kind to talk with her everyday. She has improved some; two years ago, she just stayed in the bed. Now she gets up and walks the floor all day and looks out the window seeing everyone else enjoying their lives. She won't take medication and her doctor really doesn't want her to because of elderly are prone to fall. She has no hobbies, nothing to occupy her mind except things she doesn't like. She hates the vacant lot that has a lot of trees on it that sheds into her yard. Stuff like that. Is there anybody out there in Aging Care land going through this as well?
thx
Plenty of US are hurting too, but that doesn't stop our mother's from expecting us to keep doing for THEM, now does it?
This entitlement issue that some elders have that their children need to keep them entertained and happy all day while they gripe and complain is BS. They wear us out and play the guilt card on us as though we've earned it somehow! We haven't. My uncle is almost 101, with one arm, pancreatic cancer, a widow with no children who enjoys his old age in Assisted Living without burdening his nieces and nephews with his complaining. He is a gentleman who everyone loves visiting instead of a big pain in the butt who everyone avoids like the plague. He's aged with grace as MANY seniors have chosen to do. Yet here we are, making excuses for why it's ok for our mother's to be acting like spoiled brats every day!!
Stop enabling your loved ones and use some tough love once in awhile. Say No, I can't possibly do that for you mother, I'm way too busy. Tell her you don't appreciate being treated like crap and won't stand for it anymore. Tell her you can't help her if she refuses to budge off of the sofa or away from the tv set. Then stay away for awhile so she has time to feel what it's like to not have you at her beck and call.
Your parents chose to give you life. That makes them responsible for raising you. If they truly didn't want to then you could have been put up for adoption. I feel each parent who is stating these awful remarks should be put in their place. This is so terribly hurtful.
I hope I might be near one of my 3 children if I grow very old. I don't particularly love the states they are in and I am very happy in my state but never ever would I want to share a household with them. I just might like the proximity but I may not feel that way in the future. I can't say how I will feel but I know I would never tell them they owe me their life for the past. I hope some or all of you can make this point to them.