The stress is overwhelming and intense. We live together but emotions run high, my son acts out, my husband misses attention and my mother demands attention. I am in the middle and would like to find some useful strategies on how for all to co-habituate. We are financially unable to move out and mom doesn't qualify to go to a nursing home (she supposedly makes too much $). What strategies have worked for you? Thanks!
Does your husband work? How is your nine year old doing in school? Are you doing anything about taking care of yourself?
How long have ya'll been living with your mother?
I wish you well in dealing with this and recommend facing the music soon before it turns to a sour tune.
When did she have her stroke? Does she have any signs of vascular dementia?
Who in this household goes out to work?
Babalou's response is a good one. Having additional information about your situation might result in additional insights for you.
Thank you for your response and insight. I definitely think mom will be needing skilled nursing care within the next year for sure. I'm looking into pulling resources (community and private) so that we can create a financial plan for us. It's overwhelming...I guess I know what one of my New Year's resolution will be. Thanks.
Everyone needs to be helping out here. 9 year olds can pick up their toys, make their bed and set the table. Husband can clear and do dishes while you help with homework. Can mom fold laundry, do some dusting? Is there adult daycare nearby for a few days a week?
You also need to be working on a plan for financial independence for your family. You might talk to an eldercare attorney about qualifying mom for Medicaid. At some point, she may need more care than you can give.