So my mother has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's. Before her diagnosis, she was living in NJ. We had not been in contact with one another for over three years. Now because of her illness, she lived with me for a few months before we could secure an ALF.
She's been living in an ALF for over a year. Now, they are kicking her out due to inappropriate behavioral issues. To keep her closer to where I reside, we need to be able to prove she used to live in the nearby county. Unfortunately, due to her illness and the number of years that passed (almost 22 years), we cannot gain access to any proof she used to live in the neighboring county.
Does anybody have any suggestions? I am running out of time and at my wit's end.
Thank you in advance for any information or guidance you can offer.
I appreciate all of the messages; I was getting desperate and feeling defeated.
Blessings,
Jane
We left California for 13 years, and when we moved back we were given the same license numbers we had before we left. In fact, mine is the same as the one I received when I got my first license in 1977.
If your DMV is like the one here, they don't seem to ever toss out any information.
& they want documents from over 2 decades ago? It seems odd 2 me.
I do know that for when it’s an intestate death and the heirs have got to provide documentation they are the only heirs and the now deceased & / or their also deceased spouse were married before, that for those, the attorney doing the lineal heirship filing can seek out old neighbors or old church pastors / members to have them do a notarized and witnessed document attesting that they knew of no children from the couples prior marriages….. so no plausible heirs from old marriage. Atty files it in probate court. There are probate attorneys who only do lineal heirship work. Maybe something like this could work?
Is it that she is applying for LTC Medicaid program?
GardenArtists idea of getting Title Co to do a search is excellent. Title Co run queries by an individuals name all the time to look if they have any judgements or liens against them and can go back decades.
If you are dealing with THEIR specialist you might find them a little more willing to give her another chance.
If not, you can offer her diagnostic info to anew facility, hopefully allowing her a better chance in a new start with a new facility.
Be sure to request a written statement of her diagnosis as part of the written report of her diagnosis.
That document REALLY helped to get my sweet (but VERY DIFFICULT) LO the services she needed AND also helped ME when dealing with her social security, other financial entanglements, other geriatric connections and complications.
Good luck with this. It was ver tough for me to be told my former bank President LO was being “naughty”, but ultimately it all worked out for her and for me.
As to documenting residence, even though 22 years have past, you might consider;
1. old checking account statement, old bills, and going to the taxing authority in the old county and requesting copies of paid bills.
2. Another method might be available, depending....title companies check paid taxes for properties, back to the previous owners. Title policies for years haven't gone into more detailed title issues prior to the last ownership changes, unless they're tax issues, easements, or other issues that are either beneficial or detrimental. (I.e., access and beneficial easements such as utilities would typically be list, b/c they benefit the property.)
You'd have to pay, but a title company could probably get old tax statements easier than you could. However, those also could be refused by the AL facility.
You might want to "turn the tables" on whoever is mandating this documentation, providing suggestions of data you KNOW you can obtain, and ask this individual which one he/she wants and would be acceptable.
3. Did the county refuse to provide data as requested? Could her bank provide the data?
Honestly, though, this residence issue sounds to me like a stalling issue, perhaps in hope that you'll give up and find another residence.
As to the behavioral issues, are they such that they constitute grounds for pushing her out?