After going through the emotional rollercoaster a few months ago, I was finally able to get my mother moved from our home and adjusted to a private care facility. She was doing very well until a few weeks ago when my handicapped sister fell, and was placed in the same facility. My mother has spent everyday in my sister's room and loves her being there, however she can't understand why my sister won't get out of her bed and now as my sister's condition worsens, why she won't talk to my mom. Sadly, my sister is not going to recover. She is on hospice now. She is my only sister and we are very close. I am barely holding it together and I have no idea what effect this is going to have on my mother when she dies. I am at a lose as to how to handle this situation. Probably no real answers here. I just can't go through this alone. Does anyone have any suggestions?
You will find your own way, sometimes it is easier to just sit with them. I think on some level they do understand even if it seems like they don't. You can't control what will happen so try to mourn your loss of your sister and try not to take the burden of helping your mom mourn the loss too. At the end of the day all you can do is be there for your sister and your mom. One day at a time. Best to you big hugs and strength in the coming weeks ahead.
She had forgotten by the next day, but I hated myself for causing her so much pain. Never again will I do that.
My cousin, who has severe dementia, recently had her roommate leave the facility. She was very close to this roommate. The roommate suffered from a serious medical issue and was hospitalized. She is now on hospice and will not return to the Memory Care unit. My cousin misses her terribly, but we tell her that her roommate got sick, is in rehab and that she will return when she recovers. It seems to satisfy her, but of course, she forgets and must be reminded each time she asks. I could not bear to tell her the truth, plus, I'm not sure she could process it, even if I did.