My mom is 86 with her own health issues and my dad is 87 with dementia and is incontinent. They live together an hour away from me and refuse to have people coming in the home. I see my dad not being able to move around very well and not really knowing what is going on. I think it is best for my dad who does not want to leave his house to go to a skilled facilty. Please advise.
Really, even though I have cleaned out, I still look at my 4 bedroom house and think, I'm not ready to move yet. Just got done cleaning out Moms white elephant. But I know that I can't live here the rest of my life. Too many stairs for one thing. Better I sell it in next 10 yrs instead of waiting till my 80s when it really will be overwhelming. Which I think is part of the problem. Its just too overwhelming for the elderly.
Then when the time comes where Dad needs a village to help him, if the facility offers a Memory Care area, both your parents can still remain in the same complex. Your Mom could go visit Dad for meals, etc. And then Mom can return to her Independent Living to give herself a much needed break.