I recently had a baby in my thirties. My great aunt who is 74 would always tell everyone in the family that I wasn’t going to have kids because if I was I would've had them by now and I have been sent here to look after her.
I previously visited her twice a week. We have a huge family, so she is always with someone and she has a live-in boyfriend. She has recently been checked by a doctor and she has no dementia or physical problems.
It all started when I was 6 months pregnant she decided she had to be with me all day every day and when she couldn’t she had to be on the phone to me constantly. She keeps saying she’s has no one, which is not true. She lies about people visiting her to make it look true. She makes up false emergencies to get me to go round. She says she is suicidal and the only thing that will help is if I take her out in the car everyday to cheer her up. And she wants me to buy her flowers. I have a newborn baby and have had a c-section so can’t walk or drive. She lives 10 mins away and walks to my house trying to get in my house everyday. My husband tells her I’m in bed recovering, which is true. She bombards me with phone calls all day.
I have a huge family and they have been with her everyday but she doesn’t want them she only wants me?
How do I make this stop? Please help!
Shadowing in dementia is fairly common but from what I’ve read, it isn’t common in the beginning of dementia but more towards the middle stages. She does sound manic. Perhaps someone could put in a call to her doctor to ask if she could benefit from an anxiety Med? If the doctor who examined her wasn’t a neurologist, I would be a bit skeptical that she doesn’t have some sort of dementia going on.
I had a SIL who was notorious for wanting to be around newborns in the family. I was so relieved when she became a GM so that she would back off being obsessed with my daughter. She drove her DIL nuts and her GD won’t allow her to see her great grands anymore because of her inappropriate behavior. So I get how annoying it can be and my case was nothing compared to this.
Thank goodness your husband is able to keep her away. I think I would tell her that You aren’t ready to share the baby right now and you need her to respect that. If she threatens suicide, I would call 911.
What does she mean by “ I have been sent here to look after her”. As in sent by God?
Does she have children of her own? Does she have a POA? I think a different doctor needs to see her and someone else in her family needs to take this on so you can focus on your own family. Don’t let it drag on. It’s not good for any of you.
My mom, like yours, is nice and friendly and engaging with others, but with me?? Yikes. We can barely have a conversation about anything. She can't hear me, can't understand what I'm saying, can't explain herself to me so I can understand what she's trying to say or what she wants. But chats up a storm with the caregivers I have coming in to help her with her PT, etc.
Frustrating.
1. Have someone in the family that you both know and that she respects talk to her about her obnoxious behavior.
2. Have someone in the family take her to see a psychiatrist. What kind of doctor said she had no dementia? If not dementia, something is mentally "off".
3. If she mentions suicide, immediately call 911 (or whatever your emergency number is) and have her transported for a mental health evaluation.