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Congrats on the baby. I’m sorry this time is being stressed with your aunts obsession to be with you.

Shadowing in dementia is fairly common but from what I’ve read, it isn’t common in the beginning of dementia but more towards the middle stages. She does sound manic. Perhaps someone could put in a call to her doctor to ask if she could benefit from an anxiety Med? If the doctor who examined her wasn’t a neurologist, I would be a bit skeptical that she doesn’t have some sort of dementia going on.

I had a SIL who was notorious for wanting to be around newborns in the family. I was so relieved when she became a GM so that she would back off being obsessed with my daughter. She drove her DIL nuts and her GD won’t allow her to see her great grands anymore because of her inappropriate behavior. So I get how annoying it can be and my case was nothing compared to this.

Thank goodness your husband is able to keep her away. I think I would tell her that You aren’t ready to share the baby right now and you need her to respect that. If she threatens suicide, I would call 911.

What does she mean by “ I have been sent here to look after her”. As in sent by God?
Does she have children of her own? Does she have a POA? I think a different doctor needs to see her and someone else in her family needs to take this on so you can focus on your own family. Don’t let it drag on. It’s not good for any of you.
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Purplepetal Feb 2022
Thanks for your answer. Yes she says I’ve been sent by god to look after her and that my mother had me for her. But she has been saying that for years. She has no children by choice, she never wanted any. she is one of 9 siblings we have a huge family and we all live within walking distance she is very rarely alone. She doesn’t have a POA because she is so independent, very physically fit and does everything for herself The GP seems to think she just has a bit of anxiety.
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She may still have dementia even though she was "cleared". I am new to hear and just exploring the frustration of my Mom that presents "Showtime" to others but is mean and argumentative to family. They did a screening and they said she was 98 percent fine in memory. We as a family know different. We as a family are starting to really develop boundaries like not being available for lunch when asked every time and keeping phone calls short. She is pleasant to others and very friendly and pleasant on the phone if a "friend" is a around to hear apart of the conversation but she keeps it very short.
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againx100 Mar 2022
The tests they give for memory issues pretty much stink, IMHO. They only test certain types of issues. My mom is getting advanced enough that she can't do so well on them now but I just don't get why they aren't a better tool. Like you knowing she has issues and the screening says, nah - not really. Yes, really.

My mom, like yours, is nice and friendly and engaging with others, but with me?? Yikes. We can barely have a conversation about anything. She can't hear me, can't understand what I'm saying, can't explain herself to me so I can understand what she's trying to say or what she wants. But chats up a storm with the caregivers I have coming in to help her with her PT, etc.
Frustrating.
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Stop answering your phone, for starts. Turn it off. Consider changing your number.

1. Have someone in the family that you both know and that she respects talk to her about her obnoxious behavior.

2. Have someone in the family take her to see a psychiatrist. What kind of doctor said she had no dementia? If not dementia, something is mentally "off".

3. If she mentions suicide, immediately call 911 (or whatever your emergency number is) and have her transported for a mental health evaluation.
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Purplepetal Feb 2022
She has seen a GP he said he thinks it’s just anxiety especially because she started acting extreme over night with me being told I was having a planned c-section and would be out of action for a while. He thinks this has triggered her anxiety.
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