Dementia, physically in wheelchair due to back issues and legs also failing. We don’t trust a walker anymore after many falls. 24 hour care at home, bathing, dressing for couple years and now husband has stage 3 multiple myeloma. She does not recognize me as her daughter that takes care of her for last 35 years. She does go in and out of memories as who she does know and recognizes,
but nothing to depend on.
If the speaker attempts to impose THEIR TRUTH instead of staying with the dementia sufferer, they are assuming that they can reach their listener with fact.
”Truth” is very much in the ear of the listener.
I am perfectly comfortable choosing to not be the cause of crying/grief/sorrow/anxiety in my LO.
”Facts” are not always interchangeable with “Truth”.
I have told my POAs to tell me what will make me comfortable if I become disabled by dementia, and keep “truth” for their taxes and testifying in court.
If she is used to going places in a car, tell her the day she’s going to the rehab that you’re going for a ride together.
A day or two before you plan for her to go, call and ask them if someone can come out and help her in when you arrive.
When you arrive at her new residence, call your contact and ask them to come out to the car and help you take your mom in.
Walk with her to where she’ll be staying, and give her a hug and tell her that you love her and you’ll see her soon, and leave.
The staff will know how to help her get comfortable and get into a routine.
But you can use..
The doctor said you have to stay here for a while.
This is your home now.
Mom will not understand or remember so, keep it simple. She might be confused and difficult about it, but you know you have to do what you have to do. It's for the best for both of you.
Good luck.