I'm new to this community, and have read a lot of posts before finally registering. I am concerned that my mother may be in the beginning stages of Dimentia. I would like for her to have an evaluation. However, she is totally against the idea. Saying that she can handle her affairs and accusing me of trying to "control her life". She is in the hospital as I type this, being treated for a bad infection, and refusus to let me visit, saying that I'm just being "nosy". I get the impression that she thinks she will appear more "independant" if I am not there. She will have to be there for 3 more weeks, as she is being treated with IV antibiotics. Keep in mind that she refused to see a Dr at the first sign of any problem, and this hospital stay is a result of her trying to "treat" the problem at home. I have quite a few concerns regarding her health. However, the evaluation is my main interest at the moment. Can anyone offer any answers?
I understand your angst about Mom not being far gone enough for someone to notice. Not every professional is on top of this, but some are very perceptive. With early Dementia, the symptoms can come and go. Some people are better in the morning after a good night's rest, and grow progressively more symptomatic in the late afternoon and evening, as they tire. That can affect moods, emotions, and lots of things. Don't expect miracles, or for instant diagnosis for your Mom. But don't wait to talk to someone either, if you have compelling reasons to do so. Seek out a receptive, seemingly friendly nurse to approach cautiously, if you fear repurcussions from your Mom. You can go to a Social Worker's office, and not necessarily have to stand outside your Mom's hospital room. Tell Mom, "Goodbye," then ask the front desk receptionist to direct you there. Plead your case, privately, asking the Social Worker not to let your Mom know you shared your concerns with her/him. They may not be able to answer direct questions regarding your Mom's personal health information, but they may listen to you. If you know Dementia symptoms, you know your Mom's paranoia, and secrecy is one of them. A Social Worker can also give you an idea of what a Dementia Assessment might include, but probably can't give you specifics whether about your Mom without her express written permission. You can ask that a Social Worker approach your Mom about the subject of sharing information with you, and convincing your Mom it may be in her best interests to do so. You can request that a Social Worker share your concerns with your Mom's Physician. No guarantees this will work in your favor, or the outcome, but why not try? You may be pleasantly surprised. Hopefully, it will work for you, and not against you, but no guarantees, there, either. What have you got to lose? Praying for you...