My husband and I have been together for 10 year now, we have an 18 year age difference. After we got married 5 years ago his mother needed him full time. His brother and sister want nothing to do with taking care of their mom, other than just visiting and leaving her with bad thoughts about the people that are taking care of her. To add more anxiety we now have a toddler together and it has been the toughest time I have ever experienced. I believe that I have been as supportive as I can be. I take days off work to take them to her Dr. Appointments, and running errands for both. I work and take care of my son full time. I contribute with rent and pay all the utilities. I don't know if its the age difference that makes me feel anxious and taken for granted. Am I being selfish? I sometimes feel like I should be doing so much more anyone else in any similar situations, and how do you stay connected to your husband when it feels that the only reason he chose you, is so you can help him run his errands. What recommendations would you give someone feeling this way?
You are definitely NOT selfish.
Your husband has chosen his mother over his wife and child. He did not have to do that; it was his choice. Your husband may be incapable of establishing healthy boundaries with his mother. You can try to help him establish healthy boundaries by establishing them for yourself first. You have a child to consider.
Those are my thoughts given the little I read about your situation. I hope you come back and fill in your story.
How old are you? How old is DH (dear husband?) How old is your toddler?
Are you a Stay at Home Mom? (SAHM)?
What are is mom's impairments?
What do you mean "his mom needed him full time"?
Was he working before that?
More information will get you better answers.