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Recently we went on a two day getaway only to come home to emotional abuse.
And I feel it is wrong. What can I do to get him to see she is ruining our relationship

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Is she emotionally abusing YOU? Then you say, "I will not be spoken to that way in my home and leave the room. If it's her house? "No one is allowed to speak to me that way", and leave the room. You don't do nice things for people who are abusive. Someone may get the message.
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Who has the helm of caring for her, if you do, then let him experience it forts hand. Let him be responsible for her, he is likely to appreciate you more as well as the occasional getaway.
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Afterthought: And you know what, if your husband has some choice, either his mom or you, why don't you make it for him? If he has to think about it then choose for him and leave.
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"What can I do to get him to see...." Nothing. There's nothing you can do. If his mom's behavior is acceptable to him there's not a thing you can do about it. We can't force people to see things our way, they will either have an open mind or they won't.

I'm curious as to why your husband is in a position where he has to choose either his mom or his wife.
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Depends who your husband views more highly - you or his mother. If he tends to believe and do everything his mother tells him, then you won't be able to convince him that she's ruining the relationship. If he loves his mother, but values you more, you may have the chance of doing a heart to heart talk with him about the situation and what you fear. He might listen to you and do something, he might not.
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