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Thanks for your detailed answer, Countrymouse! I try to keep him at least mentally active. I listen to what he tells me and I totally believe him when he says he's too tired to do something. From what you say, and the fact that I take his complaints seriously, it's a good thing he sees the doctor next week. My mother had multi-infarct dementia (which is now called vascular dementia) and I saw her progress downhill in steps, probably as each new mini-stroke robbed her brain of oxygen. Don's dementia may look quite similar.
Bonstance, tired and out of breath even after very brief exertion often means poor heart function and possibly fluid in his lungs which again would tie in with his vascular dementia. And, again, he may have had a 'cardiac event' - causing damage to the heart muscle and a further step down in how well his heart is pumping blood - without its being noticeable. Your doctor will be able to check that quite easily.
Has your husband ever had an echocardiogram? Is he taking medications for heart disease or high blood pressure?
Regular gentle exercise is a good thing, so encouraging him to walk around as much as he would like to is the right idea. But at this stage you want to avoid overdoing it, which could stress his heart. When you go for a walk it helps to have a rollator with a seat so that he can take breaks whenever he wants to. A little and often is best.
"Poor heart function" as a description doesn't really explain how it makes a person feel. If your body is only getting, say, half the blood supply it used to it's like a car engine being starved of fuel. You feel extremely tired, bone tired, because your cells are literally not getting the energy (from oxygen) that they need; and this affects everything from how alert you are to how well your kidneys function to how long your muscles can work for.
Any mobility is good and you want to preserve it as long as possible; but don't think of this as the result of your husband's being idle and somehow lacking in motivation. It's the other way round - he lacks energy and motivation because he's not well.
He gets tired and out of breathe easily. He is a joy to be around but is quite adamant about not wanting to exercise. I try to take him for a short walk every day, if only to get the mail (a few blocks) and get him out of the house. I have an appointment to take him to the doctor next week about the excessive sleep. Our bodies were made for motion. I wonder if he is lethargic because he leads a sedentary life.
Prolonged sleeping is very normal after stroke; which in turn is closely related to vascular dementia. Strokes can be almost unnoticeable in themselves - you wouldn't necessarily have realised what was happening.
It might be a good idea to report this change to your husband's doctor and ask whether the doctor feels investigation would be helpful (probably only if it might suggest a change in treatment, that is). A CT scan might show any significant recent damage, but it wouldn't catch a TIA in the act and smaller changes mightn't show either.
Are you worried about anything else, or just the excessive sleepiness?
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Has your husband ever had an echocardiogram? Is he taking medications for heart disease or high blood pressure?
Regular gentle exercise is a good thing, so encouraging him to walk around as much as he would like to is the right idea. But at this stage you want to avoid overdoing it, which could stress his heart. When you go for a walk it helps to have a rollator with a seat so that he can take breaks whenever he wants to. A little and often is best.
"Poor heart function" as a description doesn't really explain how it makes a person feel. If your body is only getting, say, half the blood supply it used to it's like a car engine being starved of fuel. You feel extremely tired, bone tired, because your cells are literally not getting the energy (from oxygen) that they need; and this affects everything from how alert you are to how well your kidneys function to how long your muscles can work for.
Any mobility is good and you want to preserve it as long as possible; but don't think of this as the result of your husband's being idle and somehow lacking in motivation. It's the other way round - he lacks energy and motivation because he's not well.
It might be a good idea to report this change to your husband's doctor and ask whether the doctor feels investigation would be helpful (probably only if it might suggest a change in treatment, that is). A CT scan might show any significant recent damage, but it wouldn't catch a TIA in the act and smaller changes mightn't show either.
Are you worried about anything else, or just the excessive sleepiness?