My dad is 102 and believe it or not is now starting to forget with some confusion. He can hardly hear which makes things more difficult when trying to talk to him. As I write this its 2am and he just called me to ask why its so dark outside. We live in the same building, so I ran down to talk to him and he still couldn't understand that it was 2 in the morning. I do have help come in 5 days a week for 4 hours. I feel he needs more but he is stubborn and does not want anyone staying all day. I tried to explain that he is stresses me to no end. He yells and tells me to go home but the next day he is calling me to do things for him. I am 66 years old and feel like I have no life. I can't go anywhere because I won't leave him alone for long. My husband who has been very patient with all this , is now losing his patience he wants to go on vacations (we are both recently retired) and I know its not fair to him..I feel like I am being pulled apart ...Help!
You have decisions to make. Dad cannot be alone. He needs a good physical and a neurologist. Hopefully you have POA. If Dad is found incompetent to make informed decisions, then the POA kicks in. That is when its what Das needs, not what he wants. If u want to travel, then I suggest an AL. This will give u peace of mind that he is being cared for 24/7. No trying to organize care in the home and then an aide doesn't show up.
You might even ask about an end of life hospice facility and if palliative care would be an appropriate choice for him.
Does dad get case management services through the Area Agency on Aging? Call his case manager on Monday to discuss dad's increased needs.
Who manages dad's health care? Call his doctor in the AM. Your dad's increased confusion is a "change in mental status" and warrants investigation. It could be a UTI or something else, but find out what's going on medically.