My mother has taken all the joy out of my life. I have read many articles on this site but there really aren't any answers. Only more questions. I am giving up. My son graduated from high school and she made it miserable. My daughter graduated from college, she goes into crisis and I am robbed of that joy. Now, my daughter is getting married and my mother is once again going into crisis mode. Why? Because it always has to be about her. She has to be the center of attention because she thinks she deserves it. Honestly, I can't live this way anymore with no joy, no relaxation, never unstressed or unworried. I am very close to ending it all. If I didn't have my son to finish putting through college I would kill myself and be done with it. This is what it has come to. My life or hers. And she's winning.
Try something different, a new approach. Get a babysitter for Mom because she is acting like she needs one. Every time my Mother pulled this s--t with me--from the time I was 28 years old, because that was when I figured out that what she was doing was selfish and inconsiderate, not to mention more immature than we were ALLOWED to be as TODDLERS!--I called her on it. And she cried and told me I was "just like my Father" and I said Hallelujah, thank you very effing much Mother. And she would calm down. Self-centered babies need to be Managed. Read up on Narcissists. It's time you learn a new lesson, or you will be doomed to keep repeating this one. It is a lesson: that's why it's hard and when you master it you will feel so much better, Dear One:) xo
Find the strength to do whatever it takes to reclaim your life, don't let her win. Live your life for yourself and your children.
There is a place inside you that is safe. You can go there and not be affected by her. Find it.
Whatever you are letting her hold over you, let it go. She can't hold you and hurt you unless you let her.
I hope you can find the strength to find peace in your life. Give yourself back your joy. Take care of yourself.
As such, you choose to take a break from her. You need to boldly look at her when she begins to sabotage and tell her point blank: I will not let you sabotage the joy for my family. I am sorry you are in pain, but I can't help you right now.