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First of all, I am a Veteran so I know how complex it is to navigate the VA system. If you are not a veteran but are caring for one, find a veteran’s affairs specialist in your state. NOT A LAWYER but an actual state hired officer.
Google these words “(insert your state) veterans affairs office.” Scroll pass all the ads to the actual official .gov website. Anything else will be a paid for domain and so you will end up paying someone to help you.
I have been struggling with dealing with caring for my 86 year old Veteran Dad for 2 years now. I have tried getting him help thru “civilian” channels because he doesn’t have a service connected condition and he makes “too much” money (ha, sorry) to qualify for free medical at the VA ($500 a year too much 🙄) 24 years in the mil, yet he doesn’t automatically get free medical via the VA? Anyways. Another complaint for another day I suppose.
Because he didn’t qualify for free care, I never bothered getting him registered for ANY care at the VA. (He didn’t bother because he has Tricare for life (ha, sorry again. IYKYK)
After not getting any answers or help from the civilian side I decided to try to get him service connected for something. ANYTHING!
I ended up not bothering. It was far too much for what he might have gotten. So I decided to get him registered as a paid patient thru the VA. (He pays a small copay, which is far less than what I had expected)
INFO TO HELP:
This is what he has gotten for free EVEN THOUGH HE DOESNT QUALIFY FOR FREE CARE VIA THE VA
Wheelchair ramp (almost $4,000) getting a free wheelchair next week, he has two I got him from Amazon.
If my brother hadn’t installed a shower, the VA would have paid to have it done.
30 days respite care. THIRTY DAYS FREE RESPITE CARE SO YOU CAN GET A BREAK!
16 hours of home help - they clean his house, make him meals, keep him company, etc. Let me tell you- 16 hours might not seem like a lot but when you walk into a clean house that you didn’t have to clean and your dad is fed & watching TV, not bitching about dinner or whatever, it’s a literal lifetime worth of hours
THIS IS THE MOSE IMPORTANT NOT TALKED ABOUT HIDDEN SECRET:
Veterans Directed Care program.
It is a nursing home deferment program designed to keep the veteran in their home while not making it a financial, emotional and physical burden on the family. I can’t go into all the details because there are so many. The program is nothing short of a Godsend. The VA will give you a budget, a SUBSTANTIAL BUDGET to pay someone privately to care for the Veteran, supplies & equipment for the veteran to safely live in their home. I don’t know exactly how much you can receive because it varies.
It varies on a lot of things but it is as easy as getting a case worker at the VA who can then get the ball rolling.


Trust me when I say that unfortunately the VA isn’t known for offering up stuff unless you ask for it.
Ask for it. Veteran Directed Care program.
Your Veteran deserves it and so do you.
We could not have done our time in the service without you dependents. We know our service was a burden at times to you, please don’t let caring for us be a bigger burden.
I was told “the amount will be significantly more than what the VA is paying for his care at the moment (16 hours).
Please look into this if you are caring for a Vet, and if you are a vet reading this, make sure you tell your loved ones so they don’t have to navigate the VA process. You know how not fun that is, don’t do it to them.

That won't help me with mom, but if dad ever needs help this should help a lot. Is that 16 hours per month?
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Reply to Charliana
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Sierramikewhisk Aug 11, 2024
Sorry it took me a while to respond!
no, the 16 hours is per week. But, he could qualify for more, it depends on a few things.

the two programs I have mentioned are vastly different in the aspect of money. I would definitely consider the second one - the veterans directed care program- because unless he is a certain status at the VA (it’s complicate, even for us Veterans) he won’t get as much as if he has the Directed Care program.
Ask your Dad if he has a service connected disability rating. If he does, he will know. That information will help you find out what he qualifies for when the time comes (the va will know, it is just helpful for you to know ahead of time) and make sure that he is registered for care through the VA. Even if he doesn’t need to or want to use the VA for his healthcare, having him already in the system will help shorten the process of applying and getting the stuff he needs when he needs it in the future.
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Veteran-directed Care seems to be a hidden gem; I didn't learn about it until after my dad no longer needed it. Thanks for trumpeting this resource!
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Reply to ravensdottir
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So helpful! Thanks!
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Reply to Geaton777
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Great info!!! I hope news of this spreads all over the forum!
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Reply to lealonnie1
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