Dad (93) has been going downhill gradually since his bout with pneumonia in June. But still insisted on living alone, with help from family members. He fell last Thursday and his health took a nosedive. Yesterday he was so weak he couldn't get out of bed and became incontinent. After much pleading and begging, he relented to the dreaded 911 call. This proud man was now relying on his daughters to change a diaper and the bedding after leaking through. Once he was settled at the ER his BP was still erratic, dropped significantly, and his heart rate jumped to 270. I had to make the decision to approve a cardioversion or allow him to die. The choice was obvious, but in hindsight.... did I do the "right" thing? He'll need 24 hour care now and it will break his heart to live in a facility. I'm at odds as how to move forward. His mental faculties are sharp which sometimes I think can be a detriment. At this juncture I'm drowning in guilt because I think I should have set him free to his last journey.
Prayers to you and your dad.
With my dad, he did not have a DNR, and I had to stand by and watch him being resuscitated and then placed on machines. With the help of doctors and lawyers, I was able to get a court ordered DNR for my dad after much anguish.
You may want to check to see if he has a legal/written (notarized) DNR. If your father is still of sound mind, and no DNR exists, you might want to suggest he get one. That takes the onus of a "life or death" decision off of the loved one's shoulders.
Please check into home care and let whatever time he has left be happy ones. Continue to pray for him! God can work miracles! God Bless you!